The other day I was sitting in a team meeting (a meeting where all the various health disciplines get together to discuss goals and progress of a client’s rehab) about a woman who is in her late 50’s and was hit by a car as a pedestrian and suffered a severe head injury.
This woman is estranged from her 3 children and their families, has no living parents, and only one friend who still visits. She made some choices in her life prior to her accident that seem to have driven everyone away. When she had her accident, no one was interested in reconnecting with her. So, she is alone.
One therapist mentioned that she took this woman to her childhood neighbourhood. The therapist reported it was the “happiest” she had ever seen her, and the woman herself stated that her childhood was the happiest time of her life.
I blurted out “That is the saddest thing ever! Can you imagine if your childhood was the happiest time of your life? All those years later never measured up?”
It sparked a bit of a discussion.
While I think it is awesome to have a great childhood, and have fond memories (and so important to me to help create a great childhood for my kids), it is only one part of my “happiest times”.
I have many, many other “happiest times”.
I admit that there were, are, (and will be) some weeks and months in there that I can do without. There are many dark clouds and chunks of time where I’m not sure I could see any light. But, when I look carefully, I do see a glimmer of happiness was there all along when I let myself be happy for a moment.
I know that my future also holds many more happy times to come. I would hate to hit a point in my life when I feel that I have already lived my happiest time.
I walked out of that meeting thinking to myself that I want every year to be the “happiest year ever”. Yes, every year will have its ups and downs, but I want to always make sure that every year also holds some memories that are the happiest. I need to make sure that I am doing enough of the things in my life that make me most happy to ensure I am creating those “happiest memories”.
Do you have a “happiest time” time in your life?
That is the same kind of sadness I feel for those people whose happiest time seemed to be college – as if nothing else in life ever quite lived up to it.
I did not have the happiest childhood, but since then I have gotten much better at happiness. It has been pretty well spread out for me.
I agree – “the glory” days of college that many have. It’s good to have loved that time – as one of the many times!
Love your philosophy…I, too, like to believe that my happiest times are still yet to come. :)-Ashley
I’m sure there are many happy times to come!
I love that philosophy. I got sad once when the man I babysat for (well, I didn’t babysit HIM, but his kids) told me that life peaks at 18 and then gets worse and worse. So sad! I never felt that way. I loved childhood, despite the tragedies and lack of control and hurry to grow up stuff. I still loved it. But happiest time? No. Meeting my husband was a happiest time. Meeting Scarlet and now Des? Happiest times? And I imagine and hope there are many more!
That is SO sad! To peak at 18?! I’m like you – so many “Happiest times” and many to come1
I think that right now I’m living some pretty happy times.
I always tell my boys (especially my oldest who is very quiet) that 8th (last year) and now high school shouldn’t be the best times of his life – his life should (and will!!) just get better and better. For some of the goof off kids who think they are a lot cooler than they are, they might be enjoying some of the best times of their lives which is very sad!!!
It’s an important thing to be telling our high school kids – so many get stuck in worrying about being popular then as they think that is the only time to shine. Pretty happy times throughout life is the goal!
I’ve been blessed overall with a very happy life. I have my health, I have a loving and close family, lots of great friends, two wonderful kids, a loving husband and I feel as though things just get better with each year and each new experience I have. I agree with you to live in the moment, be present, and make THIS the happiest time!
I think being present and mindfulness is SO important. I have been blessed too:))
I happen to be at a very happy place in my life right now after a period of darkness. I could however find the happy moments in that time as well. OAN – every since you pointed out your “u”s in words, I get tickled by seeing them.
I’m glad you are in a happier time, – but it is so true that even in darkness there can be happy times. SO glad I told you about the Canadian “U”s”!
Great philosophy. I think I have been blessed with some happy times even through the tough times. Childhood was especially happy for me, so I am always aware and ready to make it happy for my kids as well.
I agree. I want my kids to feel that childhood was happy and for them to go on and create more happy!
I have many “happiest times” — but also try to find joy in every day. Life isn’t just made up of milestones and life-changers — it’s a million small moments connected by a thread.
So true – a million moments and you never know which one will be the best one – the one that you remember the most. You have to love each and every moment!
How terribly sad. But this is such a good reminder to enjoy life and try to make your time as happy as possible. I can’t imagine being in that position, being older and alone. It’s hearbreaking.
I thought it was so sad too:(( It’s a reminder of how blessed I am AND how my actions now impact my future relationships. You need to plant the seeds and take care of that garden if you want a harvest later.
My mother used to say the same thing about high school when I was in the midst of angst. That it would be sad if these were the best years of my life because I had so many more ahead of me. I was looking at reunion photos from the class ahead of me a few weeks back and there was one boy, whom I know peaked in high school. It wasn’t even his reunion and there he was, reliving the best years. It is really sad.
Your Mama was right on. I remind my kids of that when they are experiencing teen and tween drama!
Wow what a way to put things in perspective…I would be sad if the happiest times were behind me. Here’s to the best year ever!
I agree. The best is yet to come AND the best has already happened. Great past, great present, great future!
You really looked at this quite perfectly. Whereas I have had many wonderful memories up to this point, I know there will be many more to come to in the years to follow!!!
Thanks, Janine! There are many more to come, especially if we are invested in our present.
I love your philosophy!!!
Thanks, Stephanie!
That’s a great philosophy, Leah. That woman’s story is so sad. We need to keep moving forward so we can continue to create happy memories.
Oh my, yes that would be sad. I hope one day she can reconnect with her family or form some new friendships I love your outlook, it is so inspiring, I want to join you in this! Let every year be the happiest year ever!
I guess I choose to put the negatives in the past and close that chapter of my life. I rarely talk about my previous marriages or the issues in them. They don’t have a place in my life. I look for the good, at least, I try to. Life is short and I really think the key to happiness is love… love of family, friends, children, parents, significant others, etc.