It’s been several weeks since Josh got back from Paraguay, but this summer has been so crazy, it’s hard to keep up!
He had a great time! He came back in one piece – minus a few clothing items which seem to have disappeared. He made some great friends, loved the people there and had some fun adventures. They worked pretty hard too – but it was rewarding. He loved his trip leader and all around had a great time. He learned about local culture and tried some pretty weird food.
I love that Josh is still coming out with stories. The other day we were driving and he was sharing some of the mischief they got into, as well as discussing what weird things he ate.
They started a google drive so everyone could upload their pictures. I went in and tried to get as many as I could with Josh in them and then also snuck some from instagram. There’s a lot! But here is his story in pictures (adding to the other ones from a few posts ago!:
These are the ones that I went back into google drive to get so they are not going to be in the right order:)
I cornered him while he was in the Miami airport to have a nice long FaceTime call (his flight was delayed 3 hours). Love his Alpaca sweater – in the middle of summer (but it was sooooooo soft) and his cool new CTR ring:
And I was so excited to see him (but Rob couldn’t make it to the airport so I have no me hugging him pictures:(
Love this guy!! He has such a big heart and kind spirit and I’m so glad he got to have this amazing experience! He said he’d love to one day go back to South America and serve a mission there:)
He got me an amazing nativity set too ( I forgot to take a picture of it before I put it with my Christmas stuff – but it is sooooo cute!!) Love the little tradition the kids have with getting one for me when they travel!
Sam is the last one to do HEFY in a few years. Maybe I can convince him to let me go and be a parent leader!!!
And that is a perfect example of this quote. I am so motivated to write my blog. I was talking to Alexandra the other day and saying how I don’t even care who reads these right now. I am writing because it is a history of our family. (And one day when I am long gone, my kids will have this to look back on – or they won’t – it will be whatever they choose! But I like to think that I am leaving behind my words and thoughts as kind of my history and legacy)
I am always motivated to write. It’s just sometimes I lack the discipline. I could say I lack time, but really none of us ever lack time. We make time to do what we want to do. It doesn’t matter how busy we are, we find the time to do what is important to us, at that moment. However, you may need to be disciplined to use your time wisely.
Discipline is what you need to get action!
Planning, talking, reviewing, learning, outlining, mapping, discussing – all great.
But it takes discipline to just do it. That is where all the magic happens.
“What is everything you are going through is preparing you for what you asked for”.
We are still doing our quotes around here, just having trouble blogging them! But, that will change when in the fall more than half of my kids will only be able to participate in our quote the week by reading about it!
This was one that hit everybody hard. As soon as Josh read it (we always have a different kid lead family night every week and they read the quote and get the discussion going), everyone said, “Woah. That’s good”.
It really gives you a new perspective to what you are going through – good or bad.
I remember in dark times praying so desperately for what I thought I wanted and needed – and not getting it. And now? So grateful that there was another plan for me. I was being prepared for what I really was asking for….
I actually remember the exact moment I found out I was pregnant. I remember what I was wearing, and I remember looking at myself in the mirror and thinking (or maybe even saying out loud, because I was in shock), I’m going to be a mother”. And then everything changes.
I became a mother.
To this amazing kid 18 years ago today at 9:15 am.
Happy 18th Birthday, Zach.
And the first few days, months (and maybe years??) slowly went by. I wasn’t sure what everyone talked about when they said “the days are long and the years are short”. Everything was long. In a good way, of course (with some fatigue and overwhelm snuck in here and there).
But then teen years approached and all of a sudden, life picked up in pace. I wasn’t around to witness every moment. This child of mine who would yell out at me at night to say his “bank bank was not working” (his blanket had slipped off him during the night and he wanted me to come cover him again) was suddenly sorting through his entire life, pulling out every piece of memorabilia, clothing and packing for his upcoming mission.
How I can let him go on a mission at this point is beyond me. Funny, because when he was little, I knew that I wanted him to serve a mission – for multiple reasons including the experience and growth he will have, and the unique opportunity to serve – but I also knew that it would be bittersweet for me (and that is an understatement). However, it was sooooooo far way, so not something to worry about or think about.
It seems rather strange that as a mother you pour your heart and soul and every morsel of your being into your child; they are your breath, your heart beat and part of your very soul – and then you turn around and they are leaving. Gone. They take your breath, your heart and a part of your very soul without them even knowing….
Ok. Off on a tangent.
But it’s an emotional time to see your baby turn 18 and get ready to fly.
And oh, the places he will go.
Let me share some of my most loved things:
!. I’ll start with the kind of friend Zach is. When our kids graduate grade we give the the Dr. Seuss book, “Oh the Places You’ll Go”. A couple of weeks again, after prom, Zach was saying goodbye to some of his best friends (who are gone for the summer and he will have left for his mission before they are home). I know it was a sad time, and when he came home he told me they had all read together, “Oh the Places You’ll Go”. To me, that represents the kind of friends he has and the kind of friend he is. That they would share that all together – sharing their hopes, dreams, unknowns. They have shared so many adventures too (more than I will ever know!) Zach is a great friend. Most of the time he asks to borrow the truck because he’s going to go pick up friends who live a little far so he can bring them back over to where they are hanging (usually quite close to where we are – or even at our own home). Then he’ll drive everyone home again after.
2. He is a great brother. Josh came home from his HEFY Paraguay trip last night. When we got home, Zach was out with his friends, but texted that he was coming back to see Josh. I wish I had had my phone to capture the moment and the expression on his face when he saw Josh – the hugest, kindest, most loving smile. I think he even ran towards him and they gave each other a giant hug! It was one of my best mama moments ever. My heart took a picture and a video:) He loves his brother. Zach has a strong connection with each of his siblings and I count on him to being some crazy glue to keep them all forever together as they grow up and start lives and families on their own.
3. He is super funny. I’ll just leave it at that. He makes us all laugh.
4. He is so hard working. It has been actually crazy to se this work ethic develop – especially over the past couple of years. He puts his all in school. He works multiple jobs. He is preparing hard for his mission now. He’s focused. Determined. Hard working.
5. He has a strong growth mind set. He knows anything is possible. He is up for the challenge and will put in the effort.
6. He is a communicator. He loves to talk – and listen. He shares stories – but is also a vault. So many times, I’ll ask another kid who shares something with me, “Did Zach know?” and he did (often annoyingly so). But he knows when to share and when to keep it quiet. You can trust him with your stuff.
7. He is positive. He has a great attitude. He looks for the best in all things, situations and people.
8. He is a good son. I feel very blessed as a mother to have had the privilege of raising him.
9. He is a boy/guy/man (oh my! He’s a man I guess!!??!) of character. He has a lot of integrity, honesty and loyalty.
10. He is Zach. A strange one but what I mean is: he is who he is, wherever he is and with whomever he is with. He doesn’t change depending on who, what or where (sometimes I wish he did, ha!).
11. He is sporty and likes to work hard in all his sports. The other day, he worked at the soccer camp he is at and then came home to go to “hill training” with only one other guy. He was MVP for soccer at school this year, and has played for the same rep team for years too – holding the role as Captain all the way through.
12. He is a great example. He is a good role model. I learn so much from him.
13. He is quirky. He has some funny mannerisms, habits, sayings. He will break out in song or dance. He pretty much jumps out of bed in the morning. He keeps the most random stuff. He’s super sentimental (as evidenced by all the stuff we have to sort in his room). He is a creature of habit (even if they are strange ones, lol)
14. He has a great memory. I attribute a lot of this to the far that he is also a big documenter: journaling, photos, videos. He’s a recorder.
15. Could being a good “binge watcher” be a good trait? We will start a show and then the next day he’s watched all 10 seasons. Am I exaggerating? Yes (but not really).
16. He’s fun to travel with. I love love love that he loves to travel. I wanted to turn my kids into travellers and I have had complete success with him!
17. He is compassionate and caring. He has a big heart. He can wear his emotions on his sleeve.
18. He loves his Heavenly Father and is willing to give up two years of his regular life to go and serve the people in Tahiti.
(Can I just also add that I love (don’t love) that he has many flaws, attitude, sass, and typical growing up teen stuff – in case I made him sound too charming! LOL Im particularly gushy right now because of him leaving so soon and so my emotions are very much on the surface ready to explode at any moment. You are warned.
Happy 18th Zach! What a year it will be!
Love you forever and more
Mom
xoxox
Here are some 18th birthday celebration pictures:
I wanted a picture of the boys hugging – so this is what I got, lol:
I asked Zach if he wanted to have some friends over for his birthday. He said he did and then I joked that I could make a cake, have party hats etc. He was keen (silly enough to be mockingly fun). His good friend has her birthday the day before so they decided to celebrate together. So we ordered pizza, had ice cream cake and brownies, and the kids played some games – before heading out:) It was cute:
I think he looks like “Where’s Waldo” in this one, lol:
All the kids were switching clothes; I’m not sure what that was about, lol:
They gave the birthday kids some gifts. Love his face in this one when he saw the cute gift his friend Leah gave him:
It’s taking me a while to catch up, and now it seems long ago as the summer routine becomes our new norm.
But, this was a fun night that needs to be documented more than just in my heart!
Both Zach and Zandra were getting ready at friends’ houses, and then going to a big pre-prom party at one of Zach’s best friend’s homes. All the parents were invited too and and when I RSVPd – the count was at 150+ people! Luckily they have a big beautiful home, and it’s a home that Zach has spent many days and nights at, so it was the perfect place for a party.
Zach headed out just as I got home.
I needed to get at least one photo in our traditional spot!
When I got to the pre-prom party, they had already started taking pics. This was one of all his closest friends – his gang that has travelled together (canoe trip last year, camping and farm this year):
Once I arrived, there was no stopping me with the camera, lol. They were all laughing at me. I’m a proud mamarazzi – and I don’t regret having the pictures! (You may regret it since there will be so many, but feel free to scroll on by – but rest assured, I’m not posting all the 300 plus photos I took):
Do I need to stop and say who everyone is? (Let’s just say that Zach and his date have known each other since kindergarten, and his buddy has been one of his best buddies since grade 2. The other girl was his Mormon Prom date, and while technically we have all lived in the same neighbourhood and seen each other around, they only got really close in the last couple of years). Most of the girls he has known since early school years – and a few from baby years!
All his best friends:
Let’s stop and take a look at these two: grade 6 grad, grade 8 grad and now grade 12! They were enemies in grade 2 (had a fight about a snow fort) and then bonded over their dislike of their grade 2 teacher…
Which means his mom and I have known each other a while too! She has been an awesome Mom to share this journey with! (and she also has two littles age 3 and 4 months old that I can steal a snuggle with when I miss the baby stage!)
Love this so much! Zach and Leah were in home daycare together since the age of 1 and recreated their famous first kiss picture!
Then of course some pics with me and Rob:
We laughed how well his tie matched my dress! lol
Another shot of some of my other fave Moms:
You might wonder why no pics of Zandra? Have no fear. She finally arrived and mamarazzi got to work:
Love this shot of her; she is so happy!
Her bffs:
My family twins and their dates:
The crowd in the backyard:
Then the party bus arrived to take them to their formal dinner:
I was across the street capturing the scene with another Mom friend – who’s son was actually Zach’s very first playdate!
We were in awe of this scene:
Zach and Zandra shared with me some of the pics at the actual party:
I’m sure there were a lot more post prom after party shots – since they got home at 5am… but this is what I got: a totally cute re-creation of their grade 6 pose!
At the end of it all….lol
What a night. What a year. What a lifetime. Oh the places they will go!
We are in full on preparation mode for Zach’s mission. It’s a bit daunting when you see the list… between what you need to buy and what you need to do. You aren’t exactly sure what he won’t have access to for two years, so it’s a bit of a guessing game, but I’m so appreciative of all the people willing to share their past experiences. So helpful.
This past week though we came across a challenge that felt insurmountable.
While working on Zach’s paperwork, we realized that the instructions we were given for his French Visa conflicted with the ability to get him to the US for his training.
Basically, long story short, he has to get a French visa in a very specific time frame. To get one, the consulate requires a ton of paperwork and an interview and they need to keep his passport for 30 working days.
We realized that the interview time where everything is submitted will mean his passport and visa will arrive back to us sometime in September. Only problem being, he is flying to the US to start his 9 week training on August 20th.
You see the complication? How can my son get to the US when the French consulate is holding his passport?
Well it certainly was a challenge.
Rob and I were making phone calls, sending emails, racking our brains for solutions and coming up with dead ends.
I was able to contact other missionaries (or their superhero moms) who required their French visas – and most had similar nightmare stories (apparently it’s a big problem for Canadian missionaries to get visas because of the need to go to the US in between home and their new home. You’d think someone would have figured out the solutions though and shared them?!) However, each solution was different and each time we tried one that had previously worked for others, we were told it was “no longer an option”.
Dead end.
I said to Rob, I may be a very directive busy bee in our family, but when it comes to super-stressful situations, he takes the lead and becomes the rock. I’m so grateful that he’s the kind of guy who is always calm, rationale and logical.
(Although I do have to say that while I felt discouraged, I kept it together. Not even a tear (which is rare for me. I’m a complete firehouse in life in general!))
With every “no” and “impossible” I started to think of alternate back up plans; he’ll just have to show up part way through training and miss some (not a great option considering it is training for two languages). He’ll have to be temporarily reassigned to Canada to wait for his visa after his training etc. Not the end of the world – disappointing for sure, but doable. It’s annoying, but it will all work out.
What did strike me as we were pondering options and encountering more closed doors, was how all it would take is one person who would extend an exception, think outside of the box, or share with me a way I didn’t know about but they did because of their insider info or experience.
When you believe in God, people often wonder how you could. If you believe in Him, how come He doesn’t step in and take care of all things? Of course this is a much bigger discussion (which I’m not going to get into) , but I thought to myself that prayers are really answered through other people. When you pray for something – somewhere, someone is getting a gentle nudge to do, act, say something – and that is your answer. Problem is that that someone might not be open to the nudge or feel it or act on it.
So in my frustration, I said a simple prayer. I prayed that whoever is feeling the nudge that will solve our problem will act on it.
I also prayed that I may be open to the nudges not only for my problem now, but always. That I may respond to the nudges that I get that are the answers to someone else’s prayers. It struck me hard how important it is to recognize how we all affect each other and how we are the solution to someone’s problem. Not just to a friend, but to complete strangers. We never know who we are “working for.”
Hours later, after exploring a promising avenue that worked for a friend of Gabe’s last year we hit another road block. No longer a viable solution. Argh!!!!
A few minutes later, an idea re–popped into my mind about something I had skimmed over in one of my gajillion random travel emails I had received over the last year: duplicate passports.
I shared my idea with Rob and he quickly googled it. He ended up finding a blog that someone had written talking about rare cases where you can apply for this in Canada.
Rob called Passport Canada. Got a lovely women who patiently listened to the complicated story. She seemingly understood and said she would try to help us. She put us on hold and got some more info. She came back on the line and said, “grab a pen because it’s not easy, there’s a lot of steps, but I think it’s doable”. She walked us through a couple of scenarios, and gave us some tips to follow and “absolute must do’s”. While it is not 100% (and there are a few unknowns) it sounds very viable and is our only option at this stage!
We breathed a sigh of relief that there is a likely option (with a lot of work and cost but what can ya do?!). I thought about my thoughts earlier about the nudges.
You see, the day before, I had had the nudge to look up duplicate passports. However, no where on the official passport Canada site was anything written about it. I could find info about it happening in the US, but not Canada. I didn’t bother to mention it to Rob at the time, because my search did not hit any Canadian options. I’m grateful that nudge returned and I shared it with Rob and let him search too and not rely on my “but I looked already”.
I thought about the person who wrote the blog that Rob found which led us to believe it was an option. Did they know that their blog would be an answer for us?
I thought about the women at passport Canada who patiently listened and then decided she would help. Did she get a nudge to not just cut us off and say “impossible” but to dig a little deeper and push past the “easy territory?”
So many nudges we all feel throughout our days are likely ignored, shoved down, rationalized away or completely missed. But those nudges could be the answer to someone in a time of need.
I made a little resolve to try to be aware of the nudges I feel and act on them even if they seem silly or inconvenient. I want to be part of the circle of humanity that serves each other and is the answer to someone’s prayer.
Fingers crossed and ongoing prayers that all will work out as it is supposed to (maybe I just needed this lesson now!)
Well he’s really into the teen years now. A little bit grumpy, a little bit silly, a little bit sassy. That’s a sign that he is fully a teen.
The messy room, the dishes left in the basement, the reminders to wear a helmet, the arguments with brothers, the laughter and stupidities (usually with brothers) combined with the endless requests to be out or have kids over, also tell me that he is a happy, healthy teen!
Happy Birthday to our littlest of littles!!
Here are 14 things I love about Sam:
His willingness to help. He may quietly roll his eyes, but I don’t even think that’s true. He just helps. He may not like it, but he gets it done without a hassle. And that is sooooooo appreciated.
His gratitude. He has always been a grateful kid. Grateful for even the smallest things. He’s not afraid to show his gratitude.
His smile. He has his quirky braces smile right now – but they are coming off SOON!!! His smile lights up his face and lights up the room!
His ability to make friends. Sam has always been a kid who is surrounded but friends. And they are from all walks of life: school, sports, church. They don’t need to be the most popular, but they can be too. It doesn’t matter. He is kind to everyone.
His love of cars just like his Dad. There must be something genetic about the Clendenning boys, lol!
His adventurous Spirit. Based on the state of how he returns from biking (both him and the bike) you know he us having a good time (and hopefully a safe enough time, lol)
His sportiness. Whether it be soccer or his new found interest in skate boarding, he’s always up to play. Tennis, basketball, baseball, track. Just maybe not swimming based on the calls we got from the school about “missing swim class”, lol.
His smarts. He really is a smart guy! Although we are kind of at that “imagine if you applied yourself ” stage right now… but high school will change that (right, Sam?!)
His love for his siblings. He has a lot of fun with the boys and tolerates some brotherly “behaviour”. I love hearing them talk about sports or silly stuff. I love feeling the energy when they are all together.
His willingness to be the youngest. he puts up with a lot! He often has to wait for things, or gets leftovers, or has to fight for his food (ha not really, but the way he scarfs food down you’d think we don’t feed him enough!)
His independence. I think we could move out and Sam could take care of himself. He might have to survive on processed food, but he’s resourceful)
His leadership skills. They shine through! He can be a great influencer!
His Spirit! I love watching my kids grow spiritually and start to see their infinite worth.
His curiosity. The seems to be a CDF trait! He is inquisitive, wants to know things, and has random facts stored in his brain which he seems to be able to share with all the other random facts that the other CDFs have in their brains! It’s amazing the conversations that they all have! He loves to learn and gain knowledge.
Happy Birthday Sammy Bear (he’ll love that!)! We love you!!!
Let’s check out some of his birthday fun:
He wanted a steak and poutine dinner and an ice cream cake. That night there was a regional church dance that he went to, so we had to have a quick dinner!
Traditional candy poster! I always try different ice cream cakes for Sam! This was a simple chocolate chip cookie one!
We were invited to celebrate Sam’s birthday with his Mom and her family, as well as some of Sam’s buddies. It was a really nice little party for him. (Rob and I are so happy to be on this new path with the kids’ mother as we feel it is such blessing for the kids – a way for them to live unified lives and reduces the stress all around!!)
Birthday season is in full swing with the launch of the CDF July birthdays!
Happy Birthday Gabe!
This was a big year for him , considering he got MARRIED!! Lots of changes, and lots of growth!
What a handsome guy, right?! And, he has the personality to match it!
Because he’s really an official adult everywhere (except in car rental world, lol), I will scale back what I love about him to 10 – even though there are way more than 10 (but I need to make sure I can keep up with traditions as kids transition… I plan on living well into my 90’s so that means kids will be well into their 60’s and it may be too much of a task for me to list 60 things I love, – even though there are that many – but it’s a lot of work, lol!)
So here’s Gabe’s 10 things I love:
His drive. This year I think was a turning point for Gabe with his academics. He made a goal for himself and has tackled it and thrown himself into achieving it. And has had great success. It’s all about his mindset, his commitment, and his drive. He know what he wants and is going after it!
His sense of humour. Gabe is quick with his humour; can always crack a joke, come up with a witty reply, and tell the funniest stories. We have so much fun when he is around!
His curiosity. Gabe loves to research things and you can be sure that he is up to date on most things. He loves to learn more and is intrigued but by so many things.
His socialness. Ever since he was young, he could work a crowd. He could walk in and talk to anyone, about any thing, at any time. He is a natural.
His loyalty and commitment. While it has always been there, I think we have seen it multiply this year as he married Shannon, commiting to their forever together. He is loyal and I have no doubt he will stand by her forever. She is a lucky girl. He is a lucky guy. They are a lucky couple.
His love and compassion: It has been fun to watch him find Shannon, fall in love and be in a marriage. You can really see how caring and loving he is. How concerned he is for Shannon’s wellbeing, how he strives to be a good partner and how he is aware of her needs as his equal partner.
His passion for his passions: Formula 1, cars, or whatever is Gabe’s passion – he is passionate about. Although some passions have remained a constant, he has also changed passions and developed new ones . When he does, he throws himself wholeheartedly into them!
His gratitude: Gabe appreciates things and people, and he is happy to share that appreciation!
His ambition: I guess this ties into number one too – but he is keeping his eye on the ball and on the path that he wants ahead of him. He’s knows that sometimes you have to sacrifice things in the now in order to get better things in the later. He is ambitious and wants to have success in his life and is willing to make the sacrifices that it takes.
His family guy-ness. This is one of my favourite traits of Rob – being a family guy – being a full partner in life – raising kids, supporting a family, building a relationship etc. and I see that Gabe is following along in his Dad’s shoes. As ambitious as he is and focused on school and work, the priority is his family – which is where I think true success really lies.
We are so proud of everything Gabe has accomplished in his life so far! He is a charming, kind, smart, compassionate and all around amazing guy. His future is bright and we can’t wait to see what it holds for him. Happy Birthday! Love you!
Two years ago, Zach set off on an adventure to Ecuador with the organization HEFY.
He had an amazing time and told all the kids it was a MUST DO trip. He learned and grew so much, made some amazing friends and came back with a new perspective and maturity.
Last year, Zandra went off with the same organization and had an incredible, life changing experience in Dominican Republic.
This year it was Josh’s turn.
Paraguay was his choice trip and he registered for it last October. It seems so far away when you register and then all of a sudden your mother is packing for you because you are trying to squeeze in as much time with your friends before you leave. Ha.
He had to fly to Miami first where he met up with his group.
He was completely calm and at ease and even patient with his mama who went over the same things hundred times, reminding him of what to do where and when.
Even though he’s the third one to go on this incredible adventure, I’m still a wee bit crazy when it comes to sending my kids off.
But of course, he texted me from Miami to say he was just fine, had met his group and was waiting for their fight to Paraguay. They took their phones away in Miami for some safe keeping and a great detox, and the leaders post daily on instagram.
So of course, I’ve been obsessively refreshing my instagram. Ha. Crazy that I share so much of my crazy.
Looks like he’s having an incredible time. Here are a few of the pics I’ve taken from instagram.
Their first weekend they spent in Brazil and went to Iguazu Falls.
Looks like they did some shopping too:
They then made their way to Paraguay where they attended church.
Some devotionals:
And then the work began…they are building some classrooms so that 60 more kids can go to school and have access to education. Pretty awesome.
Some fun times:
They are also playing a lot of soccer with the kids, so I’m sure Josh is in his element.
