Birthdays for my kids always included birthday gifts, birthday meals, birthday cake (usually homemade), a candy birthday poster (different every year and different every kid), a birthday party, a birthday instagram or Facebook plots,  and once I had my family blog, a blog birthday post that listed the all the things I loved about them based on their age.

It was no small feat considering we had 3 of the 5 kids’ birthdays all in the span of 2 weeks.

I only stopped doing the blog post a couple of years ago when life seemed to be getting too much (which I realize now was part of midlife changes I was experiencing with roles transitioning, hormones changing, and feeling like I had less capacity to handle things in general, some little things had to give).

But it was a tradition I enjoyed, bcs it allowed me to be very intentional and appreciative of the beautiful humans I have  the honour of being a parent to – in one capacity or another (mom, step mom, mother in law).

But in all my years doing it, I’ve never had a post done for me.

Now, I’m not complaining, bcs I’ve had romantic poems written for me,I’ve have beautiful texts sent to me, gifts and flowers delivered, amazing handmade cards with tender notes, letters and messages from all the people that I love in my life. I’ve had special  meals, unique gifts and creative paintings.

But never blog post. Never a  “# of things someone loved about me” post.

When I was 35, I threw my own birthday party. I was single, divorced and realized no one had ever thrown me a real birthday party. So I did.

It was fabulous (and this is the only photo I could find… but it’s with two of my besties forever) 

I rented a karaoke machine. I invited everyone I knew. Dear friends came into town, we ate amazing food, had fun drinks, sang and danced our hearts out into the wee hours of the morning, and salvaged my birthday cake that was dropped and slid down my wall.

I realized that I could throw my own parties. And it was fantastic.

And today I turn 54 and I realized, I can create my own list of “54 things I love about me”.

Arrogant? Selfish? Self centered ?

No.

Taking care of me. Giving me what I need to hear. Having my own back. Some self love, self compassion and a little fun.

Celebrating me.

All things that my midlife self needs to hear right now.

I keep a file on my phone called my “file of fabulous” where I keep all the kind texts, messages,photos of cards, poems, testimonials (work related)… my son calls it my “hype file. It’s a file I think we all should have. Something to turn to when feeling low, needing a boost  or some love.

But it’s filled with what others think.

But, what do I think about me?

What do I think about who I am, who I have become, my character, my traits, my value, my roles, my successes, my failures?

What do I love about me – much harder list to create, but somehow, celebrating me this year feels important.

So let’s goooooo….

Happy birthday me. 

Here are 54 things I love about me . In no particular order (much easier that way).

1. I love that I am writing this list and don’t give a-you-know- what about people’s opinions about it. It’s for me. (But I hope it inspires you to write your own list!) 
2. I love that I think of my kids multiple times a day, wondering, praying, sending love and good vibes – but  give them the space to live their own life.
3. I love that I have never colored my hair.
4. I love that I love to laugh and have smile lines that prove I love to laugh. I love that I am pretty funny too.
5. I love that Rob and I are on this adventure traveling together. Our travel adventure and our life adventure. 
6. I love that we talk about everything and have no secrets. And we are always laughing and lovin on each other.
7. I love that I still take photos of me even though watching my body change with menopause has been hard. I love that I’m trying to embrace all the changes. I love Anthropologie bcs it fits my body well. I’m sad I miss the April birthday credit bcs I’m in Europe this year. 
8. I love that I aim for 12500 steps a day and rarely miss.
9. I love that I get random ideas for things to do in my business and just do them. I love that over the years I have tried so many business opportunities! And I love that I am multi  passionate
10. I love that I always make time when my kids want to talk. And I’m pretty wise. I may give too many opinions, but I also love that about me. 
11. I love that I’m awesome friend and sometimes I’m a terrible friend but don’t beat myself up over it. And I’m pretty wise here too 😅 And I may also give too many opinions, but I also love that. 
12. I love that I love traditions and create them. And that my kids get annoyed with some of them. I love that I collect nativities too.
13. I love that I love  to cry in movies, shows, books, songs. I love to cry for tender things. 
14. I love that I take courses, trainings, certifications – I’m always investing in myself, my education, my personal growth
15. I love that I have a strong faith, and I trust and I doubt, and ask questions and I ponder, listen, and pray. 
16. I love that my kids are always a top priority to me.
17. I love that I invest in my marriage and choose Rob  daily. He’s my favorite person.
18. I love that I am a good daughter and sister. I’m a decent aunt, cousin and niece I think. I’ve been blessed with a good family.
19. I love that I was a good daughter in law to two sets of in laws who I loved and respected.
20. I love that I travelled on my own with my two little boys. And girlfriends. I love that I have some incredible memories from my single mom years.
21. I love that I eat chocolate bars weirdly.
22. I love that I change the words of songs that I sing.
23. I love that I have created 280 podcast episodes. And never missed a week in 5 years
24. I love that I have taken incredible trips – with my husband, with my family, with my friends
25. I love that I instilled (or tried to) the love of travel in my kids.
26. I love that I raised my kids according to what I thought was right (even though I made many mistakes) and I did my best and feel proud that I did my best. 
27. I love that I forgive myself for the mistakes with raising my kids too. Parenting is darn hard. It’s easiest to judge before you are a parent with a kid at that stage. 
28. I love that I love Loblaws white cake, dairy milk chocolate bars, chocolate tort cake from ki, good homemade cookies. I love that I love sweets I guess. But I also love sushi, cacio Pepe and Coke Zero. And any meal anyone else makes me. That’s my fave. 
29. I love that I love good food. But don’t need fancy. Actually prefer non fancy. 
30. I love that I love karaoke. Especially with my family.
31. I love that I have devoted 27 years as a speech language pathologist and have deeply loved many of my clients (and am ok admitting some were not my favourite)
32. I love that I took a leap and created the Bella Vita retreat. I absolutely adore my Bellas.
33. I love that I don’t know a lot of stuff and don’t mind saying so. I can also laugh at myself. A lot.
34. I love that I know a lot of stuff and am able to simplify and teach it.
35. I love that I tell a lot of stories and and create a lot of analogies
36. I love that as I raised my kids, I gave them opportunities for learning, developing skills, taking classes, programs, attending camps.
37. I love that I rarely missed one of their games, recitals, concerts, doctors appts, activities or even signing their permission slips. 
38. I love that I have helped my kids with homework, friend challenges, logistics of applications, itineraries, class schedules  – always willingly and truly wanting to. In the past and now.
39. I love that I have saved for a rainy day and had a disciplined system for savings for rainy days, travel, kids education, and retirement. I love that I still acknowledge I have money issues though and am working on them!
40. I love that I have experienced hurt, pain, trauma, loss, disappointment, rejection, unkindness, unfairness, cruelty… and have survived. And love that ii allow myself to still grieve. 
41. I love that I can admit to my flaws, but have learned they do not diminish my worth.
42. I love that I have given generously to charities over the years
43. I love that I take a ton of photos
44. I love that I have created 4 guided journals
45. I love that I have created a solid circle of women in my life – in person and online.
46. I love that I have created programs to help others that range from free to low ticket to high ticket.
47. I love that I am a supportive wife. And a terrible one at times too 🫤 But I am fiercely loyal and committed. And super fun.
48. I love that I love sunsets and sunrises  – and used to force my kids to watch then on vacation. Especially on the beach. I love the beach. And I love thin places and thin moments. 
49. I love that I plan great trips  – and we go on them. Plant an idea in my head and I’ll make it happen.
50. I love that I am a good mom and step mom -even if I messed up over the years, I think I still hit the 80% mark. I love that I know I’m not perfect, but know  my heart is in the right place even when I mess up. I love how I keep adding ones about parenting bcs it’s the most important to me and the hardest. 
51. I love that I have a lot of compassion for others and often make time to listen, coach, advise, witness and just be present.
52. I love that I love deep relationships. I love asking in depth questions and getting to know peoples lives bcs I care (although some may think it’s nosey 🤷🏼‍♀️) 
53. I love that I’ve started prioritizing me more, having my own back, setting healthy boundaries, not over apologizing, saying no, advocating for my needs. I love that I keep my promises, and you can always count on me.
54. I love that I already feel I have a led a rich life, and am truly blessed and filled with gratitude. I love that I’m excited for more life. More abundance. More joy. 

And one for good luck… I love that I could have kept going with this list and I snuck extra ones here and there…. Bcs I love trying to love my life to the fullest.

(And I love the colour pink, big hugs from my kids, kisses from my husband, text messages from my friends…and I love that I can be over the top and too much for some).

Happy birthday me and to every layer and version of brilliant messy me.

54 has never looked so good 🎉😍❤️

Here’s to many more years…