We landed in Lisbon on a Wednesday. The taxi dropped us at our Airbnb in the old part of the city, right in the heart of it all, which is exactly what I wanted.

Four steep flights of stairs in near-total darkness later, Rob hauling the big bags while I carried the small ones, we opened the door to our home for the next month.

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It’s small. A living room that doubles as a dining room, a bedroom, a bathroom, a kitchen.

It overlooks one of the main streets and it is, without question, adorable.

And then the heaviness of the jet lag set in and I wanted to nap.

Now, normally when we travel, the first day counts big time. The clock starts the moment we land and I want to go, run, see, eat, do. Because I feel like we are on borrowed time and every hour counts!

I usually have things planned for “Day 1” and arriving early like we did from our flight to Lisbon (we arrived at 7am) meant we would have a FULL first day!

But this time, for the first time, I didn’t have to do that.

We’re here for a month.

I have never been in one place for a month. I’ve been away for a month, years ago mind you, backpacking in my twenties, bouncing between cities and trains.

As a family, the longest we were ever away was three and a half weeks when we went downunder (and I think we took seven flights during that trip – with 5 children. Yay us!!)

And then Rob and I did a 3 week trip a few years ago and that felt long, but we also changed hotel every 2 nights (except for a heavenly week in the Maldives – but even then we wanted to try the beach villa and the over the water bungalow!) 

So staying still in one place for this long? That’s new.

Instead of hitting the ground running, we went hungry so went and got bifana sandwiches at the famous Bifanas Afonso (which is supposedly one of the best spots in Lisbon). Four euros for a sandwich, which is a total steal (especially in this day and age). We sat in a little park and ate them. And they did not disappoint!

Then we walked back to the apartment, took that luxurious nap, unpacked, went grocery shopping, and called it a day.

And my entire nervous system was screaming: What are you doing? You’re missing something. Let’s go!!!

Of course, we did also go for a lovely dinner at Time Out Market which is an 8 minute walk from us, and it has all the best of the best. We had been there last time in Lisbon, and had been drooling to come back! Cod, shrimp and of course topped off with some dessert (chocolate mousse and pastel de nata are the famous things here that I love). Then, we officially called it a day. 

The Uncomfortable Art of Slowing Down

Here is the problem that I seem to encounter over and over even at home.

When I give myself permission to rest, it actually feels terrible at first….

You see, I’ve spent years, (ok decades!) in constant motion.

Raising five kids (which in itself is a full time job), being an SLP (driving up to 20 hours a week while juggling a 25 client caseload), then running a coaching business, volunteering, making home cooked meals, juggling ex’s, and essentially managing schedules so tightly that every minute had a purpose… was a lot.

My body has been trained to operate in a state of low-grade urgency at all times. (I call it the constant refrigerator buzz that you only realize is on when you lose power.)

So when I suddenly remove the urgency (which I have been deliberately doing over the past few years), my system doesn’t sigh with relief. It panics.

And I had not anticipated the sheer panic it would feel when day 1 on our trip did not cross off half the must sees on our list already!

The second day, I pulled out my trusty walking tour app and we explored the city a bit more on on foot.

We tried another bifana spot, O Trevo (the one Anthony Bourdain loved). It was good, but sorry Anthony, not as good as our first find at Afonso. (Already becoming regulars. Already becoming snobs 😂.)

But the real star of my day two unfortunately wasn’t a restaurant.

It was the stress and tension I just felt like I couldn’t shake between wanting to explore and needing to work.

Because here’s the thing I’m realizing about working remotely from a beautiful city: your body actually thinks you’re on vacation!

Every part of me is saying go out, eat everything in sight, see everything. And yet there are calls to take, Midlife Recalibration Week to prep for (March 23-27,30, 2026 – join here), and just a whole business to run!!

Ironic I know that I teach all about the nervous system, but I truly started feeling genuine anxiety about whether I was cut out for this …this thing I’d always dreamed about doing!

And I totally didn’t expect that and it has thrown me for a bit of a loop.

Tiger Mosquitoes and Other Humbling Realities

A few other things that they don’t mention in the Lisbon travel guides:

There are these mosquitoes here called tiger mosquitoes, and they are diabolical. And I’m not even kidding.

They don’t buzz around like normal mosquitoes, politely announcing their presence.

They hide. They wait. And then they strike in the dark like tiny, itchy assassins!!

( I think they are similar to the ones we had at my Italy retreat too so maybe it’s a Europe thing?)

Anyhow, night one, a little bugger got Rob in the face and me on the shoulder and the ear.

So we have since spent a fair amount of time on a multi-day quest for mosquito zappers, and eventually landed on finding a baby stroller gadget that supposedly emits a high-frequency wave to keep them away. We shall see (Rob has also been becoming an expert about them and finding his own little tricks. I love being married to a guy who I know figures everything out!)

Next up to discuss: the bathroom situation.

For years, I have been complaining about our one main bathroom at home (we have another one too but everyone wants to use the main one). And so we shared it for years with everyone (so seven people – but who’s counting?!?)). My dream has been to have my own ensuite, but as Rob likes to joke now, it is all mine since we are empty nesters.

But still.

Anyhow, at least it had a proper shower and a bathtub.

I didn’t realize until this trip how much my evening bath was part of how I regulate my nervous system. Without it, bedtime feels off. In fact, my whole routine feels off.

It’s humbling to discover, in your fifties, that you’ve become the kind of person who needs a bathtub.

When I think about how I traveled in my early years , not needing all the same amenities, I realize that comfort isn’t just preference. It becomes infrastructure for me. 

The next place we stay, a decent bathroom will need to be non-negotiable.

Seasons Change (Even the Ones That Feel Endless)

On day three it was raining a lot, and I was feeling super grumpy (jet lag + terrorized by mosquitoes + work to catch up on = grumpy). We just hung out and we both had some calls.

Saturday arrived and we decided to venture out to go check out the famous LX Factory. A trendy area, which reminded me of the Distillery district in Toronto.

The bookstore there is so cool, and there is graffiti everywhere which we admired as we wandered around.

We found what looked like a cute patio, and let’s just say my parting words after lunch to Rob were, “Well it’s always good to get the worst meal of the trip out of the way!!”.

You get the point.

But right next door… the absolute best chocolate cake. And since we have our priorities straight, we indulged.

Later that night, we went to a Benfica soccer match. Encouraged by one of my soccer obsessed sons, Rob found us tickets and we made our way there.

The stadium was packed. The energy was electric. People here are wild for soccer and it was fun to be in that moment.

But sitting in that stadium, something hit me.

I was a soccer mom for at least 12 years. Three of our five kids ( the three younger boys) all played competitive soccer, simultaneously. 

Practices were three to four times a week per kid! Games were once or twice per kid too. Tournaments ate entire weekends. Driving hours and hours. Sitting in the rain. Leaving work early or rescheduling clients to make drop-offs. Trying to squeeze in my own exercise and reading during practices. I even went to Spain once with one of my sons when his team played there! (That I won’t complain about though – fantastic memories!)

I remember feeling like that season would never end. Like I was trapped in a loop of smelly soccer shirts, gross shin guards and cleats and sideline folding chairs.

Rob told me once, You’ll miss these days.

I told him, Never.

And there I was in a stadium in Lisbon, realizing he was right.

I actually miss the drives with the boys because that’s when they talked so much, and played me their favourite music.

I miss the conversations with the other parents, the shared chaos, the cheering on the sidelines, the rhythm of it all.

Those years felt endless while I was in them, and now they feel like they happened to someone else.

That’s the thing about seasons. They feel permanent from the inside. But the truth is they are fleeting.

Memory Dividends

So this trip, this two month adventure we are on, I am now really thinking of it as investment. Not in the financial sense (because with Rob in between opportunties, this certainly isnt the ideal time for us) but in the way that experiences compound over time. In the memory dividends way : the returns you get years from now when you look back on a stretch of time where you were fully present (a concept I read about in the book Die With Zero by Bill Perkins).

That’s why we’re doing this now. Not because the timing is perfect, but we have the health, the flexibility, and the willingness to be a little uncomfortable. And I don’t think that window stays open forever.

And I already know that years from now, I’ll think about that first bifana in the park, those dark stairwells, that ridiculous mosquito hunt and I’ll feel what I feel right now about those soccer years. Fondness. Gratitude. The particular sweetness of something you didn’t fully appreciate while it was happening.

So I’m trying,  really trying, to appreciate it now.

What the Jet Lag Taught Me

Last night, I was feeling like I was finally starting to come out of the jet lag fog.

And with the fog lifting, so did the anxiety. Which taught me something I probably already knew but needed to feel again: sleep is foundational for me.

In a very basic, biological, your-nervous-system-literally-cannot-function-without-it way.

When I’m tired, everything feels harder. Decisions feel heavier. Transitions feel impossible. The gap between where I am and where I think I should be feels enormous.

And then I sleep (really sleep) and the gap closes to almost nothing.

It’s the simplest lesson and the one I keep having to relearn.

Lessons From Week One

So that’s where we are. Four days in. Not a full week, really, but I’m calling our week one done.

The jet lag is lifting. The apartment is home. The bifana ranking is well underway. The mosquitoes remain a challenge we will conquer (Rob will figure it out).

I came here thinking the challenge would be logistics: navigating a new city, figuring out where to eat, managing work across time zones.

But the real challenge has been internal.

Learning to slow down without interpreting stillness as failure. Learning that discomfort doesn’t mean something is wrong, sometimes it just means something is new.

More next week. If the tiger mosquitoes haven’t eaten us alive!