Happy Birthday Robbie

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Another year of celebrating this incredible man!!

It has been a strange year for sure and I feel very blessed to be going though all this with Rob. There is no one I’d rather quarantine with… and spend eternity with (I kinda think this is a bit of a test, lol).

There is also no one I would rather be partners with, best friends with, raise kids with, travel with, share my ideas with, laugh with, cry with and do pretty much everything with.

Here are 10 things I love about this man:

He is so smart: There is noting he does not know. He has such a wealth of knowledge, from technical info to random tidbits that I question why he knows. He really is the smartest person I know. He can talk about anything and everything (and do anything including changing a tire on Hana road and keeping us all calm:)!!!!)

He is so humble. He also knows what he doesn’t know and is not afraid of saying he doesn’t know and finding out. He is never arrogant, and always willing to open his heart to learn more.

He is a man of great faith. I think this amplifies number 1 and 2. He has incredible knowledge and humility, but he knows that it is God who has made him this way.

He is an amazing father. I hear him listen, laugh, counsel, educate and collaborate with the kids. He is not afraid to be their guide and not afraid to be their follower. He respects their need for independence but follows his heart and the Spirit when he thinks guidance is needed. He can be fun and silly and annoying (in the most loving way, haha), but forthright, concerned and wise.

Everything I said in number 4, I can also say in number 5: He is an amazing husband. He is kind, caring, compassionate; he is funny, silly and entertaining; he is a rock and a pillow. He loves unconditionally and gets stony cold eyes when he is mad at me but he even lets me tease him about them. (And he is dashingly attractive even when mad at me lol)

He is such a a hard worker. He makes it look easy, but he puts in the long hours at work, and then also helps me with so many things in my work (he is my IT department, my editor, my sales mentor, my psychologist…). He knows how to grind and makes it look easy.

He is a man of integrity. You can trust him, rely on him, count on him. He will do anything for anyone. But he will always be upfront and honest.

He is incredibly creative. From painting to poetry, to crazy ideas, to new ways of looking and approaching things. He can find so many perspectives and approaches problems creatively.

He has so many passions: from cars, to building model cars, to painting the northern lights, to sitting at the dining room table listening to music. Let’s not forget how passionate he is about his audio equipment! We joke: is it car, audio equipment, family or audio equipment, car, family? (Just kidding ((kinda). He is a family man and knows where his priorities are!)

He is also sporty : whether it be his running, tennis playing, skiing, or getting out there playing soccer with the kids (when they were younger – it is a bit too dangerous now I think as our boys have no mercy). Sam is busy trying to see if he can beat his Dad in an arm wrestle… Regardless of how strong all the kids think they are – he was there to teach them certain sports, or to support them in playing a sport. And I have no doubt that one day he will be teaching our grandkids how to ski and play tennis!

If you know Rob even a little, you easily can see that this list is the tip of the iceberg. He is truly a man of honour, charm, heart, soul, brains and brawn. I am so blessed to be with him, to share my past, my present and my future.

Happy birthday Robbie McHottie:) I love you more and forever.

Quote of the Week

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“With deliberate and repeated effort, progress is inevitable”

I made the mistake of saying “success is inevitable” when I paraphrased this quote and Josh quickly corrected me.

Progress is inevitable.

But in my mind, any kind of progress is success.

But I also focused on the key words of “deliberate and repeated”. So it’s not just any kind of effort. It’s not just random or haphazard effort. It’s deliberate and repeated. You have to choose to put the effort in. And you have to do it over and over again.

But the good news is, progress will come. It may not come right away. You may have to wait for a while. But often when it comes, it comes with a compound effect too… so that is a good thing. Progress, no matter how slow, is always a good thing.

Our mini (hospital) getaway

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In the midst of all the Covid-19 chaos, isolation measures and preparing for Zach’s mission reassignment, Josh decided it was a good idea to plan a getaway for the American long weekend.

He went to her Dad’s on Thursday night and had a whole big bag of gummy bears and went to bed with a bit of a stomach ache.

He woke up early to a much worse stomach pain, and figured it was not the gummies. Dr. Zach luckily was in the room and determined that it was appendicitis, which Josh quickly researched, agreed on the diagnosis and then they both agreed they should get their Dad up.

Heading to the hospital in the state of emergency the city is in is not ideal. Poor timing Josh, lol. Only one parent allowed in at a time and so I sat and waited several hours outside the hospital for them to do all the tests they needed to indeed diagnose appendicitis.

A few hours later his Dad and I switched and I waited with Josh for them to admit him. It was a busy day and they had to do a Covid screening. They advised that they could not do surgery until he was cleared from Covid. I was informed it would take 6-12 hours to do.

When we were finally transferred upstairs, they indicated that it was more like 12-24 hours for the Covid screening. But they operated round the clock so surgery could be anytime. I was a bit concerned about them waiting, but they assured me he was already on antibiotics, his vomiting had stopped and he seemed to be more comfortable; all indicators that everything was fine.

Early the next morning they came to let us know they were going to be operating shortly; and very shortly after they came by to pick him up. We went to the surgical floor and off he went.

After a couple of hours the doctor emerged and let me know while things had gone well, the appendix did have a perforation which caused leakage to a mainly confined area, but also had leaked into his pelvis.

All this to say, his recovery and hospital stay would be longer.

Grrr.

So 3 nights in the hospital.

We joked and said it was our mini vacation at a resort. We are lucky to live in a city with an an incredible hospital: Sick Kids.

The nurses were awesome, he had room service (ha) and there are private rooms for all with a bed for the parent.

We spent the first night binge watching a new show, then lots of down time with mindless phone entertainment. We went on long walks through the same hallways and up and down some stairs.

His friends biked to the hospital to bring him gift and card (they couldn’t come in obviously so I went to the front of the hospital where they left the bag for me to get). So sweet. He’s got some great friends.

The only downfall (ha) is is wreaked a bit of havoc on Zach leaving for his mission reassignment to Calgary.

But it will all get figured out.

We checked out of our resort and headed home.

He had some fans waiting for him at home (they had made him a tie with material Zach brought home from Tahiti.)

And some other friends brought him by some treats to help him recover.

We are happy he is home. Happy he is doing well. Happy to have great support and love of family and friends.

Not the best getaway but I still love spending any time I can get with this guy!

Mother’s Day

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It has almost been two decades of mother’s days.

Not sure how that happened so fast.

I remember wondering what it would be like being a mother. If I would be a mother. Be a mother to who?

I have to say that motherhood is truly one of those things that you can not even imagine.

I find in recent years I have played so many more keys on the motherhood piano of life.

Initially you hover around middle C , gradually stretching into the main two octaves. Maybe three.

As your kids grow, I find I spend more and more time in the upper and the lower octaves. You know the ones that are so so high or so so low that you can barely hear them.

I feel that I am playing a full keyboard.

And yet, I know, that in many ways, this is just the beginning. There are more keyboards to add (like an organ), more pedals to play, and then layers and layers of music to be added as my kids continue to grow and as I welcome more children and eventually grandchildren into our expanding family.

I was having a conversation with Zach and Josh yesterday about life. (One of the many they were excited to participate in, lol).

I used the analogy of coming to earth with suitcases – filled with what our strengths are and what our weaknesses are. Our goal on earth is to use the strengths, and see what we can do with the weaknesses – can we accept them or turn them into strengths – or learn which ones to do which with? So when we return home, what is our suitcase filled with? Hopefully a lot more strengths…

But we also get to return home with a carry on bag. A nice big one (plus one personal item:))

We get to bring our souvenirs home in those bags.

Those are the experiences we get to have. The memories that we create.

What souvenirs are we bringing home?

I offered to the boys that they may want to consider what souvenirs will be most meaningful to them. What do they have already? Where will they invest their present time in? Their future time? What souvenirs will they be excited to have to show when they arrive home?

As a Mom, I look in my carryon bags to assess what I have collected over the years. So many experiences, so many traditions, so many travels. So many little routines, things that seemed insignificant that I picked up along the way but I love to pull out and look over. My bag is already overflowing, I’m a heavy packer.

So many of my souvenirs include my family. My husband. My kids. I feel blessed to have such a full bag of souvenirs already. I feel blessed to be watching my kids fill their own bags with exciting adventures, experiences and treasures.

I look forward to collecting so many more souvenirs and my bags will be overflowing, you can be sure.

I hope the same for my all my children.

I’m so grateful for the opportunity to be their mother/smom/mother-in-law.

Happy Mother’s Day

Happy 19th Birthday Zandra!!

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Well who knew that this girl would be HOME for her 19th Birthday?

Despite the circumstances, we are certainly happy to have her! But I also know that there is now some Hawaii in her that won’t come out and there’s a longing to head back to her little island…and I love that! I love that she is growing and evolving!

Maybe I’ll just launch right into what I love about her- there are so many things – so consider this a sampling…

  • She is growing and evolving! Growing up is not easy! Sure it has it’s perks of being able to do your own thing, but there is a responsibility that you take on. An ownership of your own life and own outcomes. Zandra is learning that and taking it all in – and doing so gracefully!
  • I love how she is keen to do “hard things”. It has always been a bit of a joke between us – my belief that it is the hard that makes you strong – and it is the hard that actually makes it good! We may laugh about it – but she tries to challenge herself and do hard things!
  • Her smile. It radiates. She lights up a room when she smiles!
  • Her laugh – it is infectious and bubbly and makes everyone around smile too!
  • She gives the best, tighest, sneeziest hugs! You feel so grounded and so present when she gives when of her hugs!
  • Her artistic talents – she does such beautiful artwork and her art has so much emotion in it.
  • Her sense of style. She pulls off so many styles and she is ever changing with them.
  • Her fabulous makeup and hair talents. If my make up ever looks good, you know she has done it!
  • Her courage: So many times I have seen her just walk up and face the lion – look him straight in the eye and kick his butt. So impressive!
  • Her writing skills – she writes such beautiful stories and is very poetic,
  • Her singing voice – when you hear her sing – she really does sound like an angel. But she can also belt out a loud karaoke song too!
  • Her dancing skills – from hip hop to hula – she knows them all, she does them all with such grace and ease! She knows how to move not he dance floor and can lead the way for any dance party!
  • Her huge huge heart. She is a giver and a lover. She loves deeply and makes you feel so important and loved!
  • She is a great conversationalist. She can hold up her end of a conversation – as well as everyone else’s! She knows how to ask questions and she is curious about other people.
  • Her love of animals. Reggie loves how she talks dog to him and gives him some good love!
  • She is a thinker and a ponderer. She take things to heart and likes to think deeply about them.
  • She is intelligent and makes school her priority! She worked hard and even got a scholarships this year!
  • She is a hard worker – she put the effort into school AND was working as well. She scheduled her time and made sure she always got it all done!
  • She is an awesome step daughter! She is kind and caring. She is funny and entertaining. I love our FaceTime calls when she is in Hawaii, love our chats while making dinner, love our talks about future dreams and past moments. I am one lucky step mom.

Wishing her a bright and adventure filled year! This is probably not how she envisioned celebrating 19 – but she is rolling with it (another admirable quality!) We love and adore her so much !

Happy Birthday Zandra B! Love you!

Quote of the Week

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“Comparison is the fastest way to take the fun out of life”.

Ever do something and have a great time doing it, and then look to your neighbour who is doing something similar, but it looks better?

How quickly does that deflate your fun balloon?

I’ve seen myself do it oodles of times.

I will write something, create something, do something and be happy and proud of it.

Only to see someone did it better, faster, more creatively, more professional looking.

And all the fun, all the pride, all the accomplishment I initially had seems to disappear.

Quickly.

While looking around can give us good ideas, it can also rob us of the joy we can feel.

Stay focused on YOU. Stay focused on your goals. Stay focused on your fun.

“It’s Over”

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I sit with the rest of the world, in shock, awe, disbelief and sadness, that we are facing such a global pandemic. Logic tells me that we will come through this all; that life will be different, but life will go on.

At least for some.

A couple of weeks ago I had received an email from the OT/ Case manager letting me know that my dear client, Henry (who I wrote about here) was sick. He was in the Long term care facility and had developed what they thought was pneumonia. They tested him twice for Covid – but it came back negative.

The third time, it came back positive. Two staff workers also tested positive.

The OT wanted to know when the last time was that I had seen Henry. It had been a several weeks early as I had to cancel due to my vacation. So, it was well before the time he would be have been infected.

I was so sad to learn of his illness – but out of everyone in that long term care home – Henry was probably the healthiest – and he took pride in that! He was always showing me how “strong” he was and giving me the thumbs up whenever I asked about his wellbeing. I knew if anyone could beat it, it was him. This disease would not be the thing that took him down.

I checked in on him through the OT who had contact with the home. I wished there was a way to contact him directly – but even though he had an iPad, I had not trained him on FaceTime (and I’m not sure he would have been able to learn it either). According to the updates, he was doing well, was eating a bit and had his colour back .

Early yesterday morning the OT emailed to say that Henry had taken a turn for the worse. His fever was back and he was having delusions and was confused. She asked for our prayers.

Last evening, I received word that Henry had passed away.

My heart broke.

This is the second client in 8 months that I have lost – and that I have truly, truly loved. Some clients are just so special and dear to you. Some clients teach you more than you teach the. Some clients steal a bit of your heart.

Henry was one of those clients.

I cried and quickly searched my phone and found a video we had made together. In February Rob visited Vienna on business and went to the Vienna Opera House. Henry had a great love for the opera and had frequented the Vienna Opera house many times, so when Rob decided to go see a performance there, I asked him to send me pictures and a video. Due to the time change, Rob was at the Opera house exactly during the time of my appointment with Henry. Rob was able to send us video clips and take multiple pictures and I was able to share them with Henry right away. We created a video together – talking about how Henry had been in that exact spot and how he loved the opera. He said the pictures and videos were “fantastic”! At the end of the video, he put his arm around me and squeezed me into a sideways hug and we both laughed:)

What a precious video that is (I wish I could share but won’t due to the fact that he was my client so privacy policy prevails:)

During my last session with Henry, we listened to some new music. The Rehab Support worker had found some of Henry’s old “mixed tapes” that Henry’s friend had brought in. The RSW saw that “Roy Orbison” was listed and even though he did not know who Roy was (too young, lol), he uploaded a bunch of Roy Orbison songs onto Henry’s iPad.

During my final session, Henry and I did some work, and then in between, we took breaks to listen to Roy Orbison songs. Henry knew them well and smiled, laughed and nodded along. Who knew that would be our very last session. Such a precious memory to have listening to some of his favourite music with him.

Tonight at dinner we were having a regular dinner conversation. We were laughing about something and Sam said “Is it over?” as a comment in our our conversation.

All of a sudden, Alexa (who I have a love/hate relationship with), started talking and said “Ok, here is “It’s over” by Roy Orbison” and it started to play….

A little message from Henry to me : it’s over, but only for now. Until we meet again.

Full Circle

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The other night I was looking through my Dad’s old missionary journal with Zach. So fun since Zach knew all the places he was talking about and even saw my Dad use words that he used (the Tahitian/French slang).

We came across a lot of entries about a family my Dad had spent a lot of time with – in particular the father of the family and two of the teenage/young adult daughters (Sophie and Josephine). He wrote about them a lot throughout his journal as the family – not only when he lived close by them, but when he moved to other areas of Tahiti too. One of the daughters seemed to have gone to school on the main island of Tahiti and so it appears he occasionally saw the family when they visited her (when he also lived on the main island).

The family was from the island of Tahaa, where it looks like (according to his journal) my Dad served a good chunk of time. Zach was hoping to go there as he wanted to walk in some of the same steps his grandfather walked in. Who knows – maybe some people there would remember him! However, Zach never made it out to the islands in his time in Tahiti.

Anyhow, on one page my Dad happened to write the last name of the family that he was close to. It was listed at the back of his journal with an address of one of the daughters. The name meant nothing to me – but Zach freaked out. The one family he had grown super close with over these past few months in Tahiti had the same last name?!? This family all lived next door to his missionary apartment – it was a big family so they even had 3 houses all in a row! Every week Zach would go to their home on his pday to use their computer and call us. He went for dinner multiple times per week and knew them all super well…. Truly a family that every mother hopes her missionary has to help take care of him:)

Zach right away reached out to the family to see if they knew the people my Dad had mentioned.

Lo and behold, the “Papi” (grandfather) of this family that Zach knew and loved – was in fact Sophie and Josephine younger brother!!!!! After several messages back and forth, Zach learned that out of all 19 children, 4 are still alive – Sophie being the only girl….She still lives in Tahiti.

We also saw my Dad mention the name of one of the sons – (he actually had written that he baptized this boy and one other (name was unclear). This son is also still alive (one of the 4) and lives in Utah!

My Mom had a few pictures she found and we were able to send them- and they confirmed that they were indeed pictures of the daughters/sisters!

Coincidence? Well, Zach’s first area and experience was pretty tough. He was happy to be transferred but really wanted to go to an island where he felt he would connect more with his grandfather. I was praying that he would be able to feel my Dad’s presence and receive some comfort from that….

Who knew that he would find himself getting to know and love and live beside a family that my Dad had known and loved all those years ago.

My Dad was with Zach the whole time.

Coming home

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As I mentioned in my last post, once we arrived safely home from Barcelona, we started working on trying to get Josh home.

Luckily BYU Hawaii had suggested pretty early on that people who could go home should go home, so Zandra was easily able to get a flight. She arrived home the same day we did but went to quarantine with her Mom.

We had to work on getting Josh home. He was in Botswana with his Dad. Luckily COVID 19 had not reached there yet, but we saw the airlines and flights home were becoming more and more limited so we were working on finding them earlier flights. We knew their original flight home was going to be cancelled, and so were scrambling for alternates. This was all completed by the fact that Josh and his dad were so remote that they did not have wifi access. His dad would borrow someone’s emergency satellite phone to call for updates and info. We finally managed to get them to Johannesburg (last flight before South African Air stopped flying) and then to Abu Dhabi, then home. Close to 40 hours travelling, but we go Josh home safe and sound too.

He was happy to be home too!

Reggie was anxiously awaiting everyone’s arrival home! lol

During all this, we were keeping in regular contact with Zach. Tahiti had it’s first case and didn’t seem like a big deal. Of course, like everywhere else, it quickly escalated, and within several day, Zach was in quarantine in his apartment. Now I know quarantine is hard for all – but it’s super hard when you are a missionary – with no technology, away from all your friends and family and not able to do what you are sacrificing everything in your life to do. They were creative with playing games and trying to reach out to people (but they have flip phones which require credit to call and text out – but their credit quickly ran out). However, there was a lot of staring at walls and entering the land of anxiety of “what ifs”.

Finally, one day, they were told that they were being sent home. While Zach wanted to stay in Tahiti, he only wanted to stay if he could continue doing the work he was called to do. It became abundantly clear that life was at a standstill there like it was here.

The next few days were a roller coaster of emotions. He said that there was so much unknown and uncertainty. One day they were told they were going home. The next day they were told they had to stay because the commercial flights were stopping. We were keeping up with the facebook posts his mission president was posting, but they too struggled with getting firm details. They were trying to figure out how to get about 140 missionaries home!

Finally, late one night, we received a flight plan for Zach. I felt such relief – and sadness – that his mission was taking this turn. We found out that he was one of 30 missionaries that had a confirmed flight. The next day, another 30 had their flight confirmed. They were all on the last international commercial flight our of Tahiti (domestic flights had stopped several days before). The others they were still trying to figure out…

Zach was scheduled to come home on Sunday, March 29th. He took an overnight flight on the 28th to San Francisco. There he was to catch a connecting flight to Toronto. Unfortunately, his flight to Toronto was cancelled. We had no idea if he had another option to get home or if he would be in limbo. Luckily Gabe took the reservation number of Zach’s literary that we had and started hunting around the different options and found that he had been put on a plane for Denver, then a connection to Toronto. (Remember Zach had no phone to call us – but we also later found out that he knew when he boarded the flight to San Fran that he was being re-routed – he just didn’t know that we weren’t yet aware).

Ready to board!

I go a little crazy tracking the flight… wanted to make sure that the flight really did leave Papeete!

I loved this picture I saw on Facebook:

We worked on some welcome home signs:

It all worked out well. We were so disappointed that we were not able to greet him at the airport:( His dad went so he could see him for a few minutes before he would be quarantined again. He sent me this picture:

However, it was awesome to see him when he got home. It was so exciting – mixed in with relief, happiness, sadness, overwhelm, joy (so amazing how so many emotions can co-exist). It was so great to just hug him so tight!

He got to talk to Gabe on FaceTime too:

We stayed up late as he emptied out his entire suitcase in our family room. We enjoyed counting his 28 new ties, haha.

The next night we had a zoom welcome home party (I wish I had taken a picture – I forgot) and so far we have just been enjoying having him home! We were excited to have Sam and Zandra come join us too – we are all quarantining with him for two weeks! It’s so nice to have the house filled (but hard to keep up with the food! Luckily we have some awesome friends who have been picking stuff up on our behalf in between deliveries!)

The kids spent some time together just hanging out. Zach is obsessed with his rubix cube, lol. Zandra gave him a haircut, and then Zach and Zandra gave Sam a haircut. Josh is holding firm on his mop of hair, lol.

We ordered in schwarma poutine for his welcome home dinner:

Truly a crazy time in our lives. It was a crazy time to be out on a mission. I’m grateful that Zach is back but know that he is excited to return (hopefully to Tahiti ) to finish off his mission at some point. But, my heart and prayers are out there with many of his buddies who are still in Tahiti (they are awaiting charter flights that the church is trying to arrange, but it is hard with all the restrictions from different countries). Also thinking and praying for my nephew who is still in Peru. Peru has been on lockdown so the church has not been able to get them out either. They will all come home safe and sound, but it is certainly not the mission they expected!

Barcelona

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Last summer we decided to plan our March break around a time share opportunity we had in Mallorca, Spain.

We decided to invite my brother and sister in law and were so excited to finally take a trip with them after years of talking about it.

We decided we would spend a few days in Barcelona, then head to Mallorca for the week. They would leave a few days earlier before heading to Madrid.

We made our plans of what we wanted to cover in 3 days in Barcelona and made all the necessary bookings.

A few days before the date we were scheduled to leave, we had some flight changes. A couple of flights were cancelled, however even though a big pain, we were able to find flights – ones that were a bit more convenient too.

We flew during the night and immediately upon landing we heard the news that Pres Trump had announced that all Americans who were overseas would not be allowed to get back home. My brother and sister in law sent us texts giving us the heartbreaking news that they had to cancel joining us.

At this point though, things still seemed relative calm. We attempted to change our tickets at the airport but so many Americans were trying to get home, so we decided it would be best to wait it out and carried on to our flight to Barcelona.

We arrive in Barcelona and everything was calm and very normal. We walked around for a bit and went to get dinner. We headed back and tried to call Expedia and waiting online for hours and got cut off…

Meanwhile, Josh was en route to Botswana with his Dad.

The next day, we decided to head out and explore the city. We knew based on the news, to be careful and keep our distance. Everyone seemed very respectful of “this suggestion”. We spent the morning walking through the gothic area, checking out some of the beautiful cathedrals, admiring the waterfront. We walked up the famous las rambles, however we avoided checking out the markets or eating as it was a but busier.

We found a great tapas restaurant and had a lovely lunch at a secluded table outside.

We headed home and watched the news. We heard how bad it was getting in Spain and knew it would be wise to get out…. We spent the next many, many hours trying to get through to Expedia but to no avail. We finally thought to call our travel insurance, they answered and we got cleared to book flights home. Flights were limited and we realized most flew through Europe. Rob found one that routed us to Mexico City – so that is the one we booked!

The next morning we got up early and headed out. It was quiet, all attractions were closed (We had tickets for Sagrada Familia, but it was closed) so we went for a long walk. We picked up food at one of the few bakeries that was open ( restaurants were closed) and headed home to chill in our hotel room.

We spent the rest of the time watching news and seeing how it was all unfolding. We were worried about all our kids all over the world – anxious to hear from them all.

The next morning we took the long flight to Mexico City. We had a 8 hour layover, so we smartly had booked a hotel room at a hotel right in the airport so we could get some rest. We finally boarded our flight home, headed home and straight into quarantine….

Here are some snaps of walking through Barcelona. It is a stunning city. One day we will go back to explore it properly!

Upon our return, we spent the next few days trying to organize for Josh and his Dad to get back as their flights home had been cancelled. After a whole lot of stress and planning, we found them tickets and they arrived home safely too:)