Raising Flowers and Skids

12 Days of Christmas – Day 4

Posted on December 17, 2019 by Leah

“On the fourth day of Christmas my Saviour gave to me”:

LIGHT

John 8:12″Then spake Jesus again unto them, saying, I am the ^alight of the world: he that followeth me shall not ^bwalk in ^cdarkness, but shall have the light of life.”

My extra verses:

D&C 88:67 And if your eye be single to my glory, your whole bodies shall be filled with light, and there shall be no darkness in you; and that body which is filled with light comprehendeth all things.

3 Nephi 18:16 And as I have prayed among you even so shall ye pray in my church, among my people who do repent and are baptized in my name. Behold I am the light; I have set an example for you.

3 Nephi 18: 24 Therefore, hold up your light that it may shine unto the world. Behold I am the light which ye shall hold up—that which ye have seen me do. Behold ye see that I have prayed unto the Father, and ye all have witnessed.

I love that light is all powerful. Darkness can never win over light. You can’t put a little bit of darkness in a light room and make it dark. But you can put a little bit of light in a dark room
And make it light. Light will always win if you use it. Let your light shine – it is the most beautiful part of each of us.

Sam’s scripture is from Luke 11:33 No man, when he hath lighted a candle, putteth it in a secret place, neither under a bushel, but on a candlestick, that they which come in may see the light

Gabe’s 3 scriptures and comments:

Alma 28:14 – And thus we see the great call of diligence of men to labor in the vineyards of the Lord; and thus we see the great reason of sorrow, and also of rejoicing—sorrow because of death and destruction among men, and joy because of the light of Christ unto life.

D&C 84:46 – And the Spirit giveth light to every man that cometh into the world; and the Spirit enlighteneth every man through the world, that hearkeneth to the voice of the Spirit.

D&C 88:7 – Which truth shineth. This is the light of Christ. As also he is in the sun, and the light of the sun, and the power thereof by which it was made.

When never notice light until it’s dark. Which may suggest that need to be more appreciative of the light that we receive, which I believe is true. But I also think that it’s speaks to just how naturally and comfortably we are in the light and that it’s where we’re truly suppose to be. Therefore, we should preserve every moment we have in it.

Zach’s 3 scriptures

D&C 6:21 Behold, I am Jesus Christ, the ^aSon of God. I am the same that came unto mine ^bown, and mine own received me not. I am the ^clight which shineth in ^ddarkness, and the darkness comprehendeth it not.

Psalms 27:1 The Lord is my ^alight and my ^bsalvation; whom shall I ^cfear? the Lord is the ^dstrength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?

Matthew 5:14-16 Ye are the light of the world. A city that is set on a hill cannot be hid. 15 Neither do men light a candle, and put it under a bushel, but on a candlestick; and it giveth light unto all that are in the house. 16 Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.

Rob’s extra scriptures and comments

The verses below really speak to me about light and how a righteous household and those in its family have a countenance that lets the gospel show itself.

Daniel 12:3 And they that be wise shall shine as the brightness of the firmament; and they that turn many to righteousness as the stars for ever and ever.

Matthew 5:16 Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.

Matthew 13:43 Then shall the righteous shine forth as the sun in the kingdom of their Father. Who hath ears to hear, let him hear.

12 Days of Christmas – Day 3

Posted on December 16, 2019 by Leah

“On the third day of Christmas my Saviour gave to me”:

MUSIC:

D&C 25:12″For my soul ^adelighteth in the ^bsong of the ^cheart; yea, the ^dsong of the righteous is a prayer unto me, and it shall be answered with a blessing upon their heads.”\

Here are my extra scriptures:

D&C 45:71And it shall come to pass that the righteous shall be gathered out from among all nations, and shall come to Zion, singing with ^asongs of everlasting ^bjoy

3 Nephi 4:31 And it came to pass that they did break forth, all as one, in singing, and ^apraising their God for the great thing which he had done for them, in preserving them from falling into the hands of their enemies.

Luke 2:13- 14 And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying, Glory to God in the highest, and on earth ^bpeace, good will toward men.

I added the last one in as even though it technically does not say they were singing – imagine that they were – with the beautiful voices that I imagine all angels have.

Gabe’s extra scriptures and comments

D&C 25:12 – For my soul delighteth in the song of the heart; yea, the song of the righteous is a prayer unto me, and it shall be answered with a blessing upon their heads.

Psalms 149:3 – Let them praise his name in the dance: let them sing praises unto him with the timbrel and harp.

3 Nephi 4:31 – And it came to pass that they did break forth, all as one, in singing, and praising their God for the great thing which he had done for them, in preserving them from falling into the hands of their enemies.

Music is such a powerful, soulful tool. And just like agency, it can be used to go down various paths in life. It can shape our whole outlook, our immediate moods and can represent the ideals that we hold. On the more uplifting side, we can reflect on life, dream about the future through music and the emotions it invokes in us. The gospel is very conscious of this and the very fact that we can not pinpoint a rational or exact reason music effects us so profoundly is a pillar as to why we’re divine beings.

Sam‘s extra scripture Doctrine and covenants 136: 28: If thou art merry, praise the Lord with singing, with music, with dancing, and with a prayer of praise and thanksgiving

Josh: -Psalm 69:30 “I will praise the name of God with a song, and will magnify him with thanksgiving.”

Zandra’s extra scriptures and comments

D&C 25:12 (duplicate)

Moses 7:53: And the Lord said: Blessed is he through whose seed Messiah shall come; for he saith—I am Messiah, the King of Zion, the Rock of Heaven, which is broad as eternity; whoso cometh in at the gate and climbeth up by me shall never fall; wherefore, blessed are they of whom I have spoken, for they shall come forth with songs of everlasting joy.

Psalms 30:4: Sing unto the Lord, O ye saints of his, and give thanks at the remembrance of his holiness.

These scriptures to me represent that we can sing out happy praises to the lord to show our thanks for the things that we have and the people that we have! It’s sorta like doing a gratitude prayer. We sing out with joy and with happiness that the lord has blessed us with those blessings. We need to stay true and faithful in order to receive those blessings, but we also need to know how to ask the right questions!

Rob: Matthew 26:30 And when they had sung an hymn , they went out into the mount of Olives (this was after the last supper. It shows how singing and hymns are such a powerful bond).

Zach’s extra scriptures:

Ezra 3:11: And they sang together by course in praising and giving ^athanks unto the Lord; because he is ^bgood, for his mercy endureth for ever toward Israel. And all the people shouted with a great shout, when they ^cpraised the Lord, because the foundation of the house of the Lord was laid.

D&C136:28 (duplicate)

Mosiah 2:28 I say unto you that I have caused that ye should assemble yourselves together that I might ^arid my garments of your blood, at this period of time when I am about to go down to my grave, that I might go down in peace, and my immortal ^bspiritmay join the ^cchoirs above in singing the praises of a just God.

Zach said he hadn’t thought about songs being a form of actual worship to to God. The gift of music helps us better worship God and have His spirit.

12 Days of Christmas – Day 2

Posted on December 15, 2019 by Leah

“On the second day of Christmas my Saviour gave to me”:

NOURISHMENT:

John 6:35
“And Jesus said unto them, I am the ^abread of life: he that cometh to me shall never hunger; and he that believeth on me shall never ^bthirst.”

I love this quote by Ezra Taft Benson: “Now the spirit, as well as the body, is in need of constant nourishment. Yesterday’s meal is not enough to sustain today’s needs.”

How silly it would be to assume that yesterday’s meal would be enough to sustain us today. Or the really good meal on the weekend where we were so full… and yet, do we not do this spiritually often? We may feast, then resort to starving ourselves. Our Spirits need nourishing on a daily basis – not yearly, not monthly, not even weekly is enough. We must nourish daily – at minimum.

Here are my extra 3 scriptures:

John 4:13-15: 13 Jesus answered and said unto her, Whosoever drinketh of this water shall thirst again, 14 But whosoever drinketh of the water that I shall give him shall never ^athirst; but the water that I shall give him shall be in him a well of water ^bspringing up into ^ceverlasting life. 15 The woman saith unto him, Sir, give me this water, that I thirst not, neither come hither to draw.

( I love how in this last version she right away said to him : Give me the water. She believed him and she acted straight away.)

Moroni 6:4 : And after they had been received unto baptism, and were wrought upon and ^acleansed by the power of the Holy Ghost, they were numbered among the people of the ^bchurch of Christ; and their ^cnames were taken, that they might be remembered and nourished by the good word of God, to keep them in the right way, to keep them continually ^dwatchful unto prayer, ^erelying alone upon the merits of Christ, who was the author and the finisher of their faith.

John 21:15-17: ¶ So when they had dined, Jesus saith to Simon Peter, Simon, son of Jonas, lovest thou me more than these? He saith unto him, Yea, Lord; thou knowest that I love thee. He saith unto him, Feed my lambs. 16 He saith to him again the second time, Simon, son of Jonas, lovest thou me? He saith unto him, Yea, Lord; thou knowest that I love thee. He saith unto him, ^aFeed my sheep. 17 He saith unto him the third time, Simon, son of Jonas, lovest thou me? Peter was grieved because he said unto him the third time, Lovest thou me? And he said unto him, Lord, thou knowest all things; thou knowest that I love thee. Jesus saith unto him, ^aFeed my ^bsheep.

(This one especially touches my heart this year as it is exactly what Zach is out there doing on his mission)

Gabe’s extra scriptures and commentary:

1 Nephi 17:3 – And thus we see that the commandments of God must be fulfilled. And if it so be that the children of men keep the commandments of God he doth nourish them, and strengthen them, and provide means whereby they can accomplish the thing which he has commanded them; wherefore, he did provide means for us while we did sojourn in the wilderness.

1 Timothy 4:6 – If thou put the brethren in remembrance of these things, thou shalt be a good minister of Jesus Christ, nourished up in the words of faith and of good doctrine, whereunto thou hast attained.

Jacob 5:71 – And the Lord of the vineyard said unto them: Go to, and labor in the vineyard, with your might. For behold, this is the last time that I shall nourish my vineyard; for the end is nigh at hand, and the season speedily cometh; and if ye labor with your might with me ye shall have joy in the fruit which I shall lay up unto myself against the time which will soon come.

It’s interesting that in life often with literal needs that we only appreciate them when we’re dire need or there is scarcity, and when we are content we seem to put aside the blessings of nourishment, whether literal or spiritual. But Heavenly Father doesn’t withhold blessings for only in times of need. And we need to recognize and always be humble for the daily and micro blessings that we’re given even if on the very short horizon we can see, there is no obstacles to foresee.

Shannon’s extra Scriptures and commentary

Jacob 7:15 And it came to pass that when I, Jacob, had spoken these words, the power of the Lord came upon him, insomuch that he fell to the earth. And it came to pass that he was nourished for the space of many days.

Alma 32:40 And thus, if ye will not nourish the word, looking forward with an eye of faith to the fruit thereof, ye can never pluck of the fruit of the tree of life.

Mosiah 23:18 Therefore they did watch over their people, and did nourish them with things pertaining to righteousness.

My dad has always talked about the importance of feeding our spirits is just as important as feeding our bodies, when we nourish our spirits we are mentally and spiritually stronger and able to withstand better the trials and difficulties of life, just as we are when we are physically fed

Zandra’s extra scriptures and commentary

1 Nephi 17:3 (already quoted above)

Alma 32:37 And behold, as the tree beginneth to grow, ye will say: Let us nourish it with great care, that it may get root, that it may grow up, and bring forth fruit unto us. And now behold, if ye nourish it with much care it will get root, and grow up, and bring forth fruit.

Matthew 17:20 And Jesus said unto them, Because of your unbelief: for verily I say unto you, If ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, Remove hence to yonder place; and it shall remove; and nothing shall be impossible unto you.

These scriptures to me all just represent hard work, faith and blessings from God. if we choose to nourish ourselves through the lords words and by doing his work, we can grow and grow into someone that only god could allow for us to be. I really just love doing small acts of kindness and nourishing others because it helps benefit them and can help me appreciate the work of the lord that has been put into my place

Sam’s extra scripture : 1Timothy 4:6 (already quoted)

Zach’s extra scriptures:

John 4:14 (already quoted)

Alma 5:34 Yea, he saith: ^aCome unto me and ye shall partake of the ^bfruit of the tree of life; yea, ye shall eat and drink of the ^cbreadand the waters of life ^dfreely;

2 Nephi 31:20 Wherefore, ye must press forward with a ^asteadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of ^bhope, and a ^clove of God and of all men. Wherefore, if ye shall press forward, feasting upon the word of Christ, and ^dendure to the end, behold, thus saith the Father: Ye shall have ^eeternal life.

Quiet Elfie goes global

Posted on December 14, 2019 by Leah

Quiet Elfie was a tradition we started when we were first married. It brought out kids endless amounts of joy.

And while it is a “kids” tradition, I’ve always been of the mindset that traditions don’t have age limits. They are just a part of your family identity. So we won’t put Quiet Elfie away until grandkids – we keep the tradition going all the way through.

In fact, this year, with two kids not making it home for the holidays, we decided that they each needed to have their own Quiet Elfie and start the tradition off for themselves this Christmas season.

Gabe and Shannon’s Quiet Elfie arrived in Houston just before December 1st, but I had to be a bit more creative with Zach’s. I knew getting anything to Zach for Christmas in Tahiti would be tough (still praying my package sent October 1st will arrive in time…) and I didn’t want to risk Quiet Elfie not arriving at all, so I packed him up and hid him in Zach’s suitcase when he left in August! At the end of November, I told Zach to go get the package and open it December 1st: (the little Nativity is a travel sized nativity his Dad got him for his mission)

Inside, was a Quiet Elfie wearing Tahitian clothing! lol

Zach was super happy to get him – and get a bit of home to start this Christmas season. He named him Elfie Silencieux, but then said he had been studying his Tahitian and so was now Elfie Muhu Muhu:

Rob challenged both Gabe and Zach to a little competition – who’s Quiet Elfie can be the most creative… a little international competition.

They can certainly be funny little elves. Here’s what they have been up to:

The American Quiet Elfie is a bit of a wild guy and loves his sweets:

Our Quiet Elfie was ticketing cars clearing the way for Santa:

More studying, eating too much candy, playing with dangerous toys, hiding and sightseeing:

Somehow, he ended up in the Vitamix!!

(He’s acting a bit strange – not sure if he realizes that it is non alcoholic cooking wine?!?!)

Hanging in Tahiti:

Josh’s sheep for his science project enjoyed watching him bowl:

Elfie Muhu Muhu is not in the best area apparently….

Zach had to rescue and comfort him. I think he also speaks English so it’s refreshing for Zach to be able to communicate with him in his own language:)

We are all trying to embrace Christ more this Christmas season; I think he’s a little too literal:

Waiting to see who is coming home for Christmas:

12 Days of Christmas – Day 1

Posted on December 13, 2019 by Leah

“On the first day of Christmas my Saviour gave to me”:

(you can read the instructions here)

THE BEAUTIFUL EARTH:

Moses 6:63 “ And behold, all things have their ^alikeness, and all things are created and made to ^bbear record of me, both things which are temporal, and things which are spiritual; things which are in the heavens above, and things which are on the earth, and things which are in the earth, and things which are under the earth, both above and beneath: all things bear record of me.”

Here are 3 extra scriptures that remind me of the beauty of the earth:

D&C 59:18-19: 18 Yea, all things which come of the earth, in the season thereof, are made for the ^abenefit and the ^buse of man, both to please the eye and to ^cgladden the heart; 19 Yea, for ^afood and for raiment, for taste and for smell, to ^bstrengthen the body and to enliven the soul.

Alma 30:44: But Alma said unto him: Thou hast had signs enough; will ye tempt your God? Will ye say, Show unto me a sign, when ye have the testimony of ^aall these thy brethren, and also all the holy prophets? The scriptures are laid before thee, yea, and all things denote there is a God; yea, even the ^bearth, and ^call things that are upon the face of it, yea, and its ^dmotion, yea, and also all the ^eplanets which move in their regular form do witness that there is a Supreme Creator.

Psalms 23:1-4: 1 The Lord is my ^ashepherd; I shall not ^bwant. 2 He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he ^aleadeth me beside the still waters. 3 He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of ^arighteousness for his ^bname’s sake. 4 Yea, though I ^awalk through the ^bvalley of the ^cshadow of ^ddeath, I will fear no ^eevil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they ^fcomfort me.

(I added this last one in because when the kids were young, we read a book called “I am David” – and in the book, David searches for the “God of Green Pastures” that he always heard one of his friends (in a concentration camp) “talk” about (he finds out later that he was rehearsing this scripture every night as a prayer). So, while this scripture is not necessarily referring to the beauty of the earth – to me it reminds me of the God of green pastures – which reminds me of the beauty of the earth. )

Gabe’s extra 3 scriptures and commentary:

I chose my scriptures mainly because it shows that the connection between heaven and earth is sometimes too far for us to comprehend and compare. However, there’s still an abundance of divinity that is consciously put into the world, despite its flaws and trials that we are here to go through. We’re never alone in this world.

Matthew 6:10: Thy ^akingdom come. Thy ^bwill be done ^cin earth, as it is in heaven.

Psalms 136:6: To him that stretched out the ^aearth above the waters: for his mercy endureth for ever.

Isaiah 42:5: ¶ Thus saith God the Lord, he that ^acreated the heavens, and stretched them out; he that spread forth the earth, and that which cometh out of it; he that giveth ^bbreath unto the people upon it, and ^cspirit to them that ^dwalk therein:

Rob’s extra 3 scriptures and commentary:

It is such a beautiful world and I love the reverence for the cedar tree in scriptures. Cedars were used for building the earliest Temples, to protect and preserve things and are know for their incredibly strong roots. The three scriptures below the cedar is representative of strength, endurance and are there to beautify our world. They also represent where all of every kind will gather under their protection. We have some in the backyard and I’ve seen them bend under huge amounts of snow, ensure blazing heat but they still always recover and reach for the sky.

Isaiah 60:13 The glory of Lebanon shall come unto thee, the fir tree, the pine tree, and the box together, to beautify the place of my sanctuary; and I will make the place of my feet glorious.

Psalms 92:12-15 The righteous flourish like the palm tree, and grow like a cedar in Lebanon. 13 They are planted in the house of the Lord; they flourish in the courts of our God. 14 In old age they still produce fruit; they are always green and full of sap, 15 showing that the Lord is upright; He is my rock, and there is no unrighteousness in Him.

Ezekiel 17: 23 In the mountain of the height of Israel will I plant it: and it shall bring forth boughs, and bear fruit, and be a goodly cedar: and under it shall dwell all fowl of every wing; in the shadow of the branches thereof shall they dwell.

Zandra’s extra 3 scriptures and commentary:

These scriptures to me represent that nature is all around us and can bring us happiness, peace and endless inspiration. I always feel closer to God when I’m outside playing in the ocean or hiking around big beautiful trees. I also love what these natural beauties represent to me! For example, the ocean and the mountains are huge and so uncontrollable. This can be related to life in that we cannot control all that comes our way, but through faith a God’s power, we can over come. For trees, they have always represented Heavenly Mother and life.

Jacob 4:6 :“Wherefore, we search the prophets, and we have many revelations and the spirit of prophecy; and having all these witnesses we obtain a hope, and our faith becometh unshaken, insomuch that we truly can command in the name of Jesus and the very trees obey us, or the mountains, or the waves of the sea.”

Alma 32:37: “And behold, as the tree beginneth to grow, ye will say: Let us nourish it with great care, that it may get root, that it may grow up, and bring forth fruit unto us. And now behold, if ye nourish it with much care it will get root, and grow up, and bring forth fruit.”

2 Peter 1:4 :“Whereby are given unto us exceeding great and precious promises: that by these ye might be partakers of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world through lust.”

Shannon’s extra scriptures and commentary (at the end of her scriptures)

Psalm 24:1 The earth is the Lord’s, and the fulness thereof; the world, and they that dwell therein.

Psalm 33:5 He loveth righteousness and judgment: the earth is full of the goodness of the Lord.

Genesis 8:11 And the dove came in to him in the evening; and, lo, in her mouth was an olive leaf plucked off: so Noah knew that the waters were abated from off the earth.

First two are pretty self explanatory, chose the last one because it’s when Noah sends a dove to see if the flood is gone and finds that the water has cleared, I think people see that in times of natural disasters when they’re looking for relief and are renewed with gratitude when rebuilding what they’ve lost on the earth

Zach’s scriptures:

Alma 30:44 (same as mine above)

Isaiah 6:3 And one cried unto another, and said, Holy, holy, holy, is the ^aLord of hosts: the whole earth is full of his ^bglory.

Genesis 1:16-18 And God made two great lights; the ^agreater light to rule the day, and the lesser light to rule the night: he made the ^bstars also. 17 And God set them in the ^afirmament of the heaven to give light upon the earth,18 And to rule over the ^aday and over the night, and to divide the light from the darkness: and God saw that it was good.

(Zach said he loves the whole chapter about the creation and especially loves the parts that say “and God saw it was good”)

12 Days of Christmas Tradition

Posted on December 13, 2019 by Leah

I need to get some Christmas posts up but given today starts the 12 days before Christmas, I knew I needed to get this one up.

This is the first year that we will not be all together at Christmas.

Gabe and Shannon are currently in Houston finishing up his internship and they head to Colorado next week to spend Christmas with her family this year.

Zach will be spending Christmas in Tahiti on his mission.

We have always had a lot of traditions around Christmas. I am a self proclaimed and proud tradition freak and love Christmas (and have passed my love of Christmas along to some of my kids so it makes being away tough). When we first were married and blending our family, we decided to introduce a lot of new traditions to help create our own CDF Christmas (initially Christmas was hard for everyone because it was different, missing certain things, doing other new things) so we made a lot of our own traditions to help us feel more united.

And it worked! ( I think!)

We have our advent calendar, Quiet Elfie (who is spreading his wings this year – more to come), quote wall, Christmas tree walk and decorating, the nativity set up, the Christmas market, Christmas letter, Christmas baking, Christmas cookie delivery and light drive with hot chocolate, Christmas PJ’s Christmas movies, and of course, our Christmas Eve activities and Christmas morning. (We’ve tried some traditions that have failed too – but who knows what else we add as our family grows!)

So this year has been a bit different with only Josh and Sam but we are still going strong! Zandra arrives home this weekend and can join in the festivities too!

However, with Gabe & Shannon and Zach being so far (and him being completely on his own without any family), I decided we needed to come up with a tradition to unite us as a family wherever we are. There will be many Christmas’ in the future where we will not be together, and since this is the first one, I decided we should start now!

I read this amazing quote:

“Each member of Jesus’s earthly family—Mary, Joseph, and Jesus—stands as supernal examples of God’s Christmas gift to all mankind. … This family was unified in seeking God’s glory; unified in serving one another; unified in fulfilling God’s will; and unified in sacrifice, obedience, and love. This holy family provides us a pattern of attributes that, when emulated by our own families, will enable us to enjoy the same blessings of unity and love they enjoyed.”
—Elder Richard J. Maynes of the Seventy

What better way to unite our family across the thousands of miles than through Christ.

What better way to celebrate the true meaning of Christmas than learning more of our Saviour.

So, starting this year, we are doing the 12 days of Christmas .

This is how I explained it to the kids in an email:

Every year, we will find a way to celebrate the 12 day’s prior to Christmas in a way that draws us closer to Christ. Perhaps each year we do it differently, or do it the same; perhaps each year someone else suggests how to celebrate it – we can try out different 12 days ways (Pinterest is full of them lol)! As we eventually welcome more spouses and grandchildren, perhaps a different family can be in charge each year and cater it to the different ages that we have. In any case, the goal is to bring us closer to each other by becoming closer to Christ during this Christmas season – even when we are far apart physically.

The excitement was astounding. LOL

Well, truth be told, it was pretty well received:))

So today is day one.

Here are the instructions they all received:

Every day, focus on one of the gifts that the Saviour has given us . Read the accompanying scripture and then do the following: (I included the days in their email)

1) Find 3 more scriptures that talk about this gift and write them down. It would be great if you shared the scriptures you found with us all (on CDF chat and I’ll pull them out and put them in an email for Zach – or you can send them to him via google hangouts directly too).

2) Notice the gift as many times as you can during your day – deliberately look for the gift – take note of it! Write down what you noticed in a journal or a note on your phone! (When we know we are writing things we tend to look harder for them!)

3) Share the gift, testify of the gift, teach about the gift, give the gift – this is an act of doing so that others can experience that same gift on this day. Be creative!

4) Feel the love of the Saviour as you come to get to know Him better by learning of the great gifts He is offering you. Ponder what each gift really means to you personally. This is the true meaning of Christmas and the reason for everything.

Oh and to be fun, you can sing each day to the 12 days tune:)

Because Zach only has access to his emails once per week, this year I have sent them the list of gifts and scriptures a head of time – but in future – we can do it day by day.

For the blog, I will post it daily and at the end of the day come back to edit the post to add what people have sent me.

You are welcome to follow along!

Importance of Family

Posted on December 7, 2019 by Leah

I met Henry (name changed) about 5 years ago. He was a spry 73 year old who was an unfortunate pedestrian struck down while crossing the road.

The majority of the time, I meet with all my clients in their homes, however Henry insisted we meet in a public place. I learned from the OT that he was embarrassed by his home as it was extremely cluttered – and he bordered on being a hoarder.

No worries, I found a local library that happened to have a lovely little room that became our weekly office for 2.5 years.

Henry was initially resistant to work with me. He was a proud man, who was insistent that he had no challenges – compounded by an injury in the brain that makes insight difficult. He agreed to work with me “to make me feel better about trying to help and to allow me to do my job”. He also insisted if he was going to do MY work, then I had to be agreeable to do HIS work – meaning he would educate and school me in things that were important to him — and that “clearly I knew nothing about. ” I agreed.

Week after week, he would bring in books, music and topics to discuss ranging from travel to electronics to opera, to nutrition and vitamins, to levitation and near death experiences. I would introduce him to memory exercise, reading strategies, work finding activities and his absolute favourite – watching and discussing Ted talks. I would take notes for him and he would bring them home and re-watch the videos while following along with my notes.

We bonded over his birthplace of Lubeck, Germany – where my grandmother was born – and he was thrilled to hear all about my trip there 2 years after I met him. We spoke of his life – his family and his memories. He talked of his life in Germany and his early memories with his twin brother. He spoke of coming to Canada and his extensive travel around the world. He shared stories about the kind people that gave him work when he arrived in Canada. While fond memories of younger years, he shared that he was estranged from his siblings (his twin brother and a sister) and didn’t give more information other than it did not bother him. His was a solitary life. I teased him about the women in his life – and he shared that there had been one, but it had not worked out and he chose to remain single – “women are too complicated” he would tell me and say he felt “bad for my husband”.

His heart was huge and every week he would bring me “gifts” – usually things that he was trying to clean out from his cluttered home. He would tell me to use the items or give them away. Each week I was always fascinated by what he would bring me – 15 miniature flashlights, 12 sticks of glue, 5 pairs of winter gloves, 10 rolls of tape, hundreds of paperclips….

I began noticing that he was regressing with his speech and communication and was concerned. With TBI – people get better or stay the same. Not regress – especially as rapidly as he was. The OT noticed too. A referral was made to a neuro psychologist and it was queried whether the accident had triggered some type of dementia or other neurological disorder and suggested further investigation and monitoring.

Unfortunately, the insurance company who was paying for rehab services felt differently and stopped funding support. I slowly used up all my sessions and bid my friend good bye – letting him know that he could reach out to me at any time. That was 2 years ago.

This past summer the OT reached out to me. The insurance company had finally realized that Henry’s injuries were more complicated and they were therefore obligated to provide him with services again (he was deemed “catastrophic” in Ontario insurance world lingo.) She asked me to get reinvolved.

She warned me Henry had deteriorated significantly and was no longer living on his own. I went to go see him in the long term care facility and he greeted me as a someone who was greeting a long lost friend. I was touched. And completely devastated to see that his progressive disease had robbed him of his speech and some of his comprehension. No longer were we able to banter back and forth, instead he struggled to communicate with single words, gestures, and facial expressions. Writing messages to him helps increase his level of comprehension so we started working together again with a notebook and lots of trial and error – much like playing charades.

We (the rehab team) decided that we would request the insurance company to fund the purchase of an iPad so that I could get some therapy related apps, and he could have some entertainment – mainly he could listen to music – in particular his beloved opera. The insurance company agreed, so today I went in to visit Henry and brought him the new iPad. His rehab support worker (RSW) was there too (and would help set it up).

Henry was overjoyed with the purchase. I made it clear that it was purchased with the insurance funds – but it was his own. He was thrilled to have something of his own. He said ” I cannot believe it” -which is one of the longest phrases I’ve hear him say. He grinned from ear to ear, clapped his hands and repeated “thank you”.

As Henry and I conversed – the RSW began setting up the iPad. The RSW decided that it would be wise to use as a password Henry’s date of birth. I asked Henry if he knew it and he said no. So, I looked in my file, wrote it down and showed it to him – to see if he recognized it. At first he was confused but after few repetitions he understood that it was his date of birth.

Almost in slow motion, I saw his face crumple and he started to cry. I quickly asked him what was wrong, and he began sobbing, and sobbing and sobbing. I went to him, rubbed his back and wrote questions asking what was going on. He continued sobbing but in between mumbled words and I was able to determine he was talking about his twin brother, and missing his family. As he continued sobbing, I reached out to hug him and he then clung to me and cried like a baby. I knew enough from the past to know that he had been estranged from his family butI did not know any recent history. I just held him and let him cry and cry – probably like he never had before – uttering words in between sobs such as “twin”, “sister”, “miss”, “no family”, “mother” and “father, “gone” . I got gist. It was heartbreaking.

After I left I called the OT to try to get some recent background. She informed me that Henry’s twin had passed away last year – and Henry had simply shrugged when he heard about it; it didn’t seem to bother him. She then said, that while going through his stuff for the upcoming legal case about the accident, Henry’s lawyer had come across the contact info for Henry’s sister. Long story, but he was able to reach Henry’s niece who informed him that Henry’s sister had recently passed away. Last week Henry was given the news and broke down then too.

Years of estrangement. Years of regret. All the time I knew Henry he was always so casual about the estrangement. He never shared the details, although it seemed that it was more a function of distance, disinterest and independence rather than big rift. He spoke kindly of his siblings, but it just seemed like they were not a big priority to him. He was an independent man who didn’t need anyone.

Until today. When the years of emotions came sweeping through him and he wept like he probably has never wept before. I’m not sure exactly what he was feeling, but I can only imagine that with the flood of emotions he demonstrated – he was feeling great loss. We can move away, we can build our lives in other places, with other people, we can go on for years without needing to return home. But home is in us. Our roots are always there and as far away as we can go – we are always drawn back to where we all started. In the end, family is all we have.

I hung up the phone with the OT and thought of my own family: my family of origin, my family of procreation, and my extended family – and thought about how they all make up the fibers of who I am. How each one has had a role and a contribution, and in the end, they are all that matters. Rifts, conflicts, estrangements, “justified” distance, difference of opinions – they don’t matter in the end. They only shortchange you and your posterity from building lasting relationships that should be eternal in nature.

I pray that as the years pass, that we will just keep adding to our family, and any conflict, misunderstanding, annoyance, distance, or challenge will be overshadowed by memories and experiences and a desire for a future together for generations to come.

I won’t every forget Henry’s deep sadness at the family he had lost, but I’m glad to be a little piece of his family now.

Mission Q&A Part 6

Posted on December 4, 2019 by Leah

You have always said Mormons are very focused on free agency and choice. Also I see you with your kids very focused and respectful of their individuality and self expression etc . How does that marry with all the strict rules for a mission for you as a parents who seems to really trust your kids and their choices ?

Like everything, I guess it’s a matter of perspective.

I don’t see having rules or regulation, or laws or guidelines as limiting anyone’s free agency.

There is a law to wear seatbelts in our country, and I frequently witness in my work the effects of people who chose not to wear seatbelts and got into accidents. There are laws for bike helmets, laws to not drink until a certain age, laws to not speed over a certain limit. But do we see these laws being broken? All the time.

Rules and laws don’t take away someone’s free agency. They are there to try to protect people. But you can’t force someone to obey them.

So, when I talk about my children having their own free agency and ability to make their own choices, I truly believe they do. They are free to adhere to laws, rules and guidelines. Sometimes there seems to be no consequences to breaking them. Sometimes there are dire consequences. Sometimes the consequences are hidden or will only be seen in the long term, sometimes they are immediate. As a parent, I can’t control the consequences my kids will have if they choose one path vs another path along their life journey. But I trust that they have a good solid base from which to make good choices, and I trust that if they choose something that does not offer them the best consequences, then they are capable of handling that too. I can’t be running beside my grown children trying to put sunscreen on them their whole lives so they don’t get burned (can’t remember where I heard that but I loved it!) They know about sunscreen, they have sunscreen, and they have the ability to choose to apply if they wish and as often as they wish.

I don’t believe you have more free agency if you have no rules, guidelines or laws to follow. I think some may think that no rules give them more agency, that somehow, it gives them freedom to do what they want. They also may feel more comfortable doing it, but that’s just how they are choosing to think and subsequently feel. Others may think that rules equate to being able to control or force people (and perhaps some people have personalities that are more pressured into doing things because of rules). But in the end, agency is agency. Everyone has the ability to choose what they want, rules or no rules. All your agency, all your choices are completely in your thoughts. You can choose to make something negative or positive by how you choose to think about it.

People always ask about Mormons and not drinking. They usually say something along the lines of it being so restrictive and why would I want to be in a religion that “forces” me not to drink. (The Church introduced the “Word of Wisdom” (which is a health code that that members choose to follow ) back in the 1830’s). The thing is, I don’t feel forced. Why? Because I am not forced. I also don’t see it as being a deprivation. I’m not “missing out” on anything as I am making a choice as I feel there are things I am gaining by not drinking. I am making a choice to not drink. A choice based on my perspective, views, thoughts and feelings. Some people make the decision to drink. We each have the ability to make our own choices regardless of the rules in place. Yes, it might mean if I do not follow it then I am not able to partake in other parts of my religion – but that is all part of my choice. I know if I do not wear my seatbelt because I find it uncomfortable, there is a chance if I get in an accident I will be more seriously injured. That consequence needs to be considered in my decision to not wear my seatbelt. We can’t really separate out choices from consequences. With freedom comes responsibility.

So basically how can I marry my belief in free agency while still sending my child on a mission with strict rules?

Because he exercised his agency by choosing to go on a mission. He will exercise his agency every day by choosing to follow or not follow a rule. He will exercise his agency if he decides to come home early from his mission, or extend his mission. Every day, every decision, every moment, he is exercising his agency. He may appreciate the guidelines, especially the ones that keep him safe, and/or he may find some of them annoying. But it is always ultimately up to him on whether he follows them or not.

He also knows that with free agency comes accountability, so every time he exercises his agency, he is responsible for the results. (It’s also important to note that if you go against rules you are not kicked out of the mission; some no one will even know but you if you break them. Others are more serious and do carry higher consequences, but again, you are well aware of the whole picture when you go out on a mission. Most don’t head out on a mission purposefully aiming to break the rules. However, they may decide later on that they don’t want to live by the rules, so can exercise their agency to come home too).

Free agency is a gift that we have been given and we all have it. Everything we do in life is a choice, including whether we want to follow rules, laws, guidelines or suggestions.

If you want to follow Zach’s actual mission blog here it is: zachfioretahitimission.blogspot.com

Quote of the Week

Posted on November 23, 2019 by Leah

“The best way to predict your future is to create it” Abraham Lincoln

I’ve been trying to focus on this a lot recently: thinking about what result I want in the future and then acting as if I have already achieved it.

Asking myself “what would I be doing now if I knew that this would be my result in the future?” It’s amazing what you can come up with.

It’s something that I have been trying to help my kids with too: what would you need to be doing now to ensure that you get the result that you really want in the future. Sometimes it really helps make decisions a bit easier and see things a bit more clearly.

A getaway to Mexico

Posted on November 22, 2019 by Leah

Many years ago I was gifted a timeshare. I have never been to the actual timeshare still to this day, but we have traded it for many vacations over the years.

One of the first times I used the timeshare trade was back in May 2007 when I took the boys to Mexico. I talked about it here. It was an awesome trip!

A couple of months ago, I found a steal of a deal for flights to Cancun and also realized that I had a bonus week through my time share that I could use! So we booked! It was not an all inclusive resort, nor on the main glitzy strip, but perfect for relaxing and spending time together. The day after I arrived, while walking on the beach, I realized that it was just next door to the place I had stayed with the boys in 2007! It was so fun to return to that beach and point out to Rob all the little fun spots I had explored with the boys – our fave restaurant was gone though – just a shell remaining:(

It was also a great reminder of how my life has changed since that last time I was there…. and like that blog post , I had built the tracks and the train has been travelling on them every since. In fact, we are on to new phases of our life with 3 of our kids having graduated to “adulthood” (or close to, lol) and laying their own tracks.

It was a perfectly wonderful week – although there was lots of rain, and stuff to deal with back home (little kids, little problems; big kids, big problems), we managed to hit the beach everyday, go for walks, read books, nap, watch a bunch of Netflix and I was able to work on my course I am taking with no interruptions.