Raising Flowers and Skids

Josh’s Poem: Invictus

Posted on October 30, 2014 by Leah

Invictus
BY WILLIAM ERNEST HENLEY
Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds and shall find me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate,
I am the captain of my soul.

This was an easy one for me to pick for Josh; he actually picked it himself.

A couple of years ago I had shared it as a Quote of the Week (even though it is a poem), and it seemed to touch him. So much so that he read it over and over. He talked to me about it. We learned about the connection to Nelson Mandela and talked about it’s meaning in great depth; stanza by stanza.

For his birthday last year, I wrote it up, and had someone create a special “poster” of it for him. He keeps it by his bed. Recently, we decided to start to memorize it together. He suggested that we recite it when we go to the jail Nelson Mandela was in when we are in South Africa this coming March. Love this about this guy. This poem just speaks to him, just touches him. I love sharing memorizing it with him and reciting it with each other over the phone, or while walking to school, or while lying and cuddling in bed at night.

He is the master of his fate. The captain of his soul.

Zach’s Poem: Man in the Arena

Posted on October 29, 2014 by Leah

Zach’s poem is not really a poem, but an excerpt from the speech “Citizenship In A Republic” delivered at the Sorbonne, in Paris, France on 23 April, 1910 by Theodore Roosevelt.

It spoke to me for him.

THE MAN IN THE ARENA

It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better.The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.

I love the first couple of lines about the critic; something that can sometimes be a struggle, especially when one is competitive in nature:) (Sorry, my son, you got that from me.)

I love even more the visual of the fight, the struggle. The hard work, determination, and passion it takes to just get in there. These are all characteristics that I think of when I think of Zach. My hope for him is he always continues to dare greatly, that each victory or defeat in his life is seen as a triumph – for the success, or the experience.

Zandra’s Poem: Phenomenal Woman

Posted on October 28, 2014 by Leah

Phenomenal Woman
BY MAYA ANGELOU
Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
I’m not cute or built to suit a fashion model’s size
But when I start to tell them,
They think I’m telling lies.
I say,
It’s in the reach of my arms,
The span of my hips,
The stride of my step,
The curl of my lips.
I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.

I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please,
And to a man,
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees.
Then they swarm around me,
A hive of honey bees.
I say,
It’s the fire in my eyes,
And the flash of my teeth,
The swing in my waist,
And the joy in my feet.
I’m a woman
Phenomenally.

Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.

Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can’t touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them,
They say they still can’t see.
I say,
It’s in the arch of my back,
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.

Now you understand
Just why my head’s not bowed.
I don’t shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.
When you see me passing,
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It’s in the click of my heels,
The bend of my hair,
the palm of my hand,
The need for my care.
’Cause I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.

This poem was chosen last year to represent our Phenomenal Girl’s Weekend, which I explained here. I tried to find another poem for Alexandra, but this was the one I kept coming back to.

As a woman, there is so much I want her to know. I want her to know she has infinite worth. I want her to know that she is beautiful, inside and out. I want her to know that she can do anything she sets her mind to. I want her to know that she should never settle for anything as she deserves the best.

I love that this poem sums up so many things to celebrate about being a woman and the confidence it exudes about the honour and privilege it is to be a woman.

I’m honoured and privileged to share womanhood with Alexandra. She is truly phenomenal.

Gabe’s Poem: If

Posted on October 27, 2014 by Leah

If—
BY RUDYARD KIPLING

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or being hated, don’t give way to hating,
And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream—and not make dreams your master;
If you can think—and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build ’em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with Kings—nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
And—which is more—you’ll be a Man, my son!

I have posted this poem before, as I love it so much. I love it for Gabe as he is a questioner. He is also at the stage right now where he is searching for who he is, what he believes, and where to find the answers.

He is very much like Rob in that way. I don’t need as much exploring and searching. If it feels right, if I have an experience that confirms things for me, that’s all I need. Funny, I am a very logical, rationale person, but for some things, my heart’s confirmation is enough. Rob, on the other hand, dissects things. Searches. Ponders. Researches. Collects Data. Weighs. Evaluates. Then, at some point, he allows the other side of things come into play; the side that often can’t be explained by reason. Or can’t be expressed in language; there are no words. Only feelings, emotions, desires, sensations. But it is very much real.

The beauty and fulness in life comes from combining the two. In this poem, I see it as a message to a son to make sure to have balance. To develop characteristics that develop your mind, body and spirit. To be aware of your weaknesses and strengths. To be hard, but to be soft. To think with your head, and your heart. Allow colour into your life; not just black and white.

Those are things that I hope for Gabe, and I hope this poem helps him remember to balance these things.

Poetry

Posted on October 25, 2014 by Leah

One of things I enjoyed doing while in the Outerbanks, was work on my art journal, that I started way back here, read and prepare some good quotes for our kitchen quote (and quote of the week here), and read some poetry.

I sometimes struggle with a bit of insomnia. While researching and learning more about insomnia with one of my clients, I have learned if you can’t sleep, then get up and do something for a while and then try going back to sleep. So, that is what I did.

One early morning, I started looking around Pinterest for some great poems (I find it such a good forum to get me lost in so many great things).

I can’t explain poetry.

Robert Frost said, ” A poem begins as a lump in the throat, a sense of wrong, a homesickness, a lovesickness.”

I was always drawn to it in high school. Not the complicated, “I don’t know what it is saying” kind of poetry, but some stuff really spoke to me. I even kept a poetry binder. (Wish I knew what happened to it).

I love the simple verse:

“We were together.

I forgot the rest.”

Walt Whitman

“If I had a flower

for every time I thought

of you, I could walk

in my garden forever”

Alfred Lord Tennyson

I love the longer ones too (more to come not that though).

So as I read, I could feel my eyes get heavier, until I finally put down my phone and drifted off to sleep again. What was amazing was how the words still swirled in my head while I entered that slumber state. Just goes to show that what you feed your brain gets analyzed and processed while we drift off to sleep; hence the importance of choosing carefully what we feed our brains.

In that sleepy state, my mind also comes up with some good ideas. I like to think that I’m receiving inspiration during these sleepy moments. I decided to write my kids a note (as I often do — but haven’t done so in a while). I would include, on one side, all the things I love about them or what I think of when I think of them. On the other side, I would choose a poem that I think is for them.

Hopefully, one day, they will gain the same appreciation for their poem that I have:)

Stay tuned to hear what I chose for each of them….

Outerbanks 2014

Posted on October 24, 2014 by Leah

Shortly after Rob had his heart attack (seems a lifetime ago, but really only 7 months ago), we decided we were going to take a week on our own in the fall to head to our favourite spot: The Outerbanks. It would be a time to just do simple things: be together, walk, sleep and then do all the things that we don’t have time to do: paint, write, read.

This past week was that week. It is a nice time of year to come, as there are no crowds, the weather is still nice, and you can get a great deal on a beach house:)

Although we had to both squeeze work in the mix of things too, we were able to get so many things done that we wanted to do.

I’ll let some pictures tell the story of the week (and you’ll have to bear with all the sunrise and sunset pictures…but that is a huge part of our time in the Outerbanks)

Here we are driving down:

The view from our house:

Jockey’s Ridge:

Heading to Ocracoke

Sunsets

Sunrises (from our bedroom)

Here’s what my talented husband did one afternoon:

Love this place. Love this precious time together.

The Golden Ticket

Posted on October 23, 2014 by Leah

A few months back I was re-reading a talk that was given back in Oct 2011 at one of our Church’s semi annual conferences, by Dieter F. Uchtdorf. It was called “Forget Me Not” — and is an amazing read, especially for mothers as they struggle with finding balance in their lives.

In it, he tells this story:

In the beloved children’s story Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, the mysterious candy maker Willy Wonka hides a golden ticket in five of his candy bars and announces that whoever finds one of the tickets wins a tour of his factory and a lifetime supply of chocolate.

Written on each golden ticket is this message: “Greetings to you, the lucky finder of this Golden Ticket … ! Tremendous things are in store for you! Many wonderful surprises await you! … Mystic and marvelous surprises … will … delight, … astonish, and perplex you.”3

In this classic children’s story, people all over the world desperately yearn to find a golden ticket. Some feel that their entire future happiness depends on whether or not a golden ticket falls into their hands. In their anxiousness, people begin to forget the simple joy they used to find in a candy bar. The candy bar itself becomes an utter disappointment if it does not contain a golden ticket.

So many people today are waiting for their own golden ticket—the ticket that they believe holds the key to the happiness they have always dreamed about. For some, the golden ticket may be a perfect marriage; for others, a magazine-cover home or perhaps freedom from stress or worry.

There is nothing wrong with righteous yearnings—we hope and seek after things that are “virtuous, lovely, or of good report or praiseworthy.”4 The problem comes when we put our happiness on hold as we wait for some future event—our golden ticket—to appear.

I have been able to identify many golden tickets in my life: When I graduate from graduate school, when I get that job that I want, when I have a baby, when I get remarried, when we have a baby together to solidify our family, when the ex gets nicer, when the kids get older and more self sufficient….

Different golden tickets that come in different shapes and sizes.

Sometimes I got the golden ticket! And, I admit, that it was “mystical and marvellous” and brought me great joy and happiness.

Sometimes, I didn’t get the golden ticket, and that brought such sadness, heartbreak and pain.

But, either way, the golden ticket – is fleeting. It can bring happiness, or sadness, but it can not bring permanence. There is no way that the golden ticket is all we ever need. We always will be looking for the next golden ticket.

And isn’t it funny how, in search of the golden ticket, we overlook what the golden ticket is actually supposed to bring us. “Lifetime supply of chocolate” was promised – but the people carelessly tossed aside the chocolate bars that they had, trying to find the golden ticket.

Do we do that sometimes? While “waiting” for a bigger, or better blessing, not appreciate the sweet blessings that are right in front of us?

Perhaps we need to spend a little bit more time focusing on what we have, rather than what we want.

I know this is something that I need to work on, given the “planner” nature I have. I can plan great things for the future. But, you know what? I am living great things now.

I am going to make sure I am tasting all the chocolate that I already have and relish every bite.

New York for Thanksgiving – Part 3

Posted on October 22, 2014 by Leah

We usually are up bright and early on vacations, ready to go; but these mornings have been a little more lazy, with us lounging in bed and the kids watching an episode of Gilmore Girls before we head out.

We made our way to the subway and headed all the way down to Lower Manhattan.

There we wandered around and looked over the river at the Brooklyn bridge (next time we will walk it), walked on Wall Street, and then snacked at Battery park while admitting the Statue of Liberty. There we enjoyed some street meat:)

We spent some time at the 9-11 Memorial site. Line ups everywhere were long (I guess it’s Columbus Day in the US so everyone headed to NYC!), so we didn’t go in the museum. Next time for that too….

We headed up to Soho and strolled around and made our way to the Village, where we had an amazing Pizza dinner at John’s Pizzeria on Bleeker Street.

We continued on our stroll, with the kids still playing this crazy “line” game, where they have to follow each other in a straight line. People thought they were crazy, although I did catch a guy chuckling at a light! We found the Highline and walked it; I can imagine it is beautiful without the crowds of people. We ended up at 34^th Street, where we caught the subway and headed back home for a little siesta before dinner.

We decided to go local and went to the Harlem Shake for burgers, jerk fries and various shakes. Yummy. But with a price tag. We had a strict cash budget for this trip, so we splurged, but tomorrow will have to compensate!!

NYC is such an awesome city. We really had an amazing time…and our bodies are feeling all the walking…

A little sum of our weekend (which includes some pics from my iPhone too:)

NYC

So long New York… we will be back…

New York for Thanksgiving – Part 2

Posted on October 21, 2014 by Leah

We awoke to a rainy day:( but the forecast said it would clear up so we had faith. We took our time getting ready, then finally armed with hats, umbrellas and light jackets, we headed out. First stop was Levain bakery for the most amazing cookies ever!!

We continued along Broadway and found our way to Tom’s Restaurant from Seinfeld and took a few pics. We had some yummy bagels at Absolute Bagels to try to balance out our cookie tummies! We headed to the Museum of Natural History – but the lines were unreal, so we decided to skip it. Back to Central Park, where we walked through and made our way to Strawberry fields and the Imagine Mosaic. So beautiful. (All weekend, the kids were playing this “follow on the straight line game” — it got interesting in traffic. Rob and I joined in for bit, but mainly loved watching them play this game!)

We headed back up to Columbus where we walked to the LDS Manhattan temple. We were able to go to the third floor where the meetinghouse is and rested a bit – so nice to feel welcome in these chapels/meetinghouses wherever you go!

We finally headed to Time Square! The crowds! The M&M store was super busy, and we checked out the Toys R Us store and the amazing ferris wheel! We finally got out of the crowds and headed to New York City Public Library. Across the street was Chipotle so we had a late lunch and tried to rest our weary legs.

After this late lunch, we walked to get a better view of the Empire State building, and then back along 5^th where we hit the American Girl store! Zandra wished she were a few years younger…

Rockefeller centre was next on our list. I couldn’t believe the ice rink was up! We checked out the Lego store too and then say NBC.

St Patrick’s was under a lot of construction, but we stopped in and they were having mass. We continued along 5^th Ave, admiring the high-end shops, and a quick stop in the Trump Building before we made it to FAO Schwartz! We found the big piano, and then Rob and I crashed on some stairs while the kids went around and found some things they wanted to buy (they had their September allowance money and their own money). We were zonked, but they were still excited to be in this toy store!

After the goods were purchased, we crossed over to the Plaza hotel and wandered a little – but there was a big gala, and we certainly couldn’t blend in.

Crazy enough, we headed back to Time’s square to see it late at night, with all the busy lights! We then tried to figure out how to get back to our weekend home! It took a few looks at maps, asking people, and a bit of a sketchy subway ride and walk, but we arrived, completely exhausted, having walked 34km!

Dinner was a gourmet canned soup and Mr. Noodles, enjoyed in front of a Gilmore Girl’s episode! We all crashed and slept pretty soundly….ready for more exploring….

New York for Thanksgiving – Part 1

Posted on October 20, 2014 by Leah

We have wanted to go to NYC with all the kids for ages now, and finally found a long weekend to do it! It’s seems to be rare that we have the kids for Thanksgiving weekend, so we are used to have our turkey fix a couple of weekends before, so that’s what we did, leaving the long weekend free for a little road trip.

A 6am start is usual for us, and we loaded up the truck and were on our way. The kids watched some Amazing Race from an old season I bought, Gilmore Girls and we played our traditional “trivia” for jellybeans/junior mints/Mike and Ike’s game, with some people getting super competitive!

We made record time and made it to NY by 4pm (traffic was a breeze), including a few stops on the way. We had rented off VRBO, an apartment in a brownstone in Harlem and found street parking (free!) right outside the brownstone! Having told the owners we would be there at 5:30, we decided to explore around the neighborhood and made our way the 12 blocks to the North start of Central Park. I have never been this far north – and I have to say, the park is gorgeous there!

We stopped for a little street food (empanadas) and picked up a few groceries before heading back to our home for the weekend on 123^rd street. It had the turn of the century charm and we loved the creakiness and character (and price!). After a quick dinner of some mac and cheese, we headed back out to stroll the neighborhood. We found White Castle where the kids devoured a couple of sliders each and checkout out the world famous Apollo Theatre. We headed back and the kids settled in for the night watching a movie and some more Gilmore Girls (show of choice for this trip).

Off to a good start!